More Offensive than Drop Dead Diva

So Drop Dead Diva is this show about a fat chick and a thin chick who each get into their own car accidents and die. Through who knows what kind of machinations the fat chick body doesn't die but somehow the soul of the thin chick ends up in it. And oh my god now the thin chick is fat. How will she survive?! Horrifying.



Yet, in my hours and hours of watching ABC Family channel, I have found something even more horrifying. Labor Pains starring Lindsay Lohan. In it she plays a girl who is about to get fired from her job. Instead she tells her boss she is pregnant. He doesn't fire her and then she continues on with the charade of being pregnant buying pregnancy bellies and all that. And this is a comedy? I can't figure out how she's going to get out of this mess without pissing off everybody except since it is a comedy you know she'll come clean and they will all forgive her because this is TV Land.



Later today I'll post my review of Harry Potter. It is mixed. Oh and maybe I'll finally take my camping pictures off my camera and post those too. :)

Better Week

I've decided this week is going to be a FABULOUS week. I believe this is my karmic pay for the jackass I had to put up with all weekend long.

1. I have a videoconference interview with a position in Philadelphia. I can totally do the job. I LOVE Philadelphia. Seriously this could be good. (Fingers crossed I don't come across as the total low self esteem boss hating neurotic I really am)

2. I'm going to go see Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince on Thursday night. I've ordered my ticket on Fandango. I'm all ready to go.

3. Well ok so that's it for THIS week, but I'm sure there will be more good things to come (like Chicago and the ability to quit my job before I have to do my performance review with bossman).

4. Well I am going to cook enchiladas tonight. I do love the enchiladas. That's good too. I did very very well at eating at home mostly last week and not eating out too much (one lunch and one dinner only!). I'm going to try very hard to continue that trend. (And WOOT! Chicken breasts are on sale 1.99 a pound. It's a sign! :) ) (Ok I don't believe in signs, but if I did it would be)

My Girls

I never post photos of my girls. They are not my children so I won't show their face online even though I think on a good day only 3 people read this but I did like this photo and can share it. We went camping at Kayak Point Park in Snohomish Co. We had a pretty good time. Played a lot of Apples to Apples and played on the playground. We cooked and ate and did arts and crap. All in all it was a pretty successful camping trip.

Chicago!

So I'm going to Chicago for a few days later this month. Michelle's going to Blogher conference and I'm going to just be a tourist. You can imagine my joy at the email I received from my celiac group listing GF restaurants in Chicago. I'm not positive I'll get to go to one, but it is nice that there are options that I may be able to easily find. I may have to actively seek out Swirlz Cupcakes. Now to figure out what I'm going to do whilst there. :)

Wildfire
Rose's Wheat Free Bakery
The Balanced Kitchen
Da Luciano's
Stillwater Restaurant and Wine Bar
Gluten-Free Grocery
Adobo Grill
Weber Grill Restaurant
Lou Malnati's
Whole Bakers
Uno Chicago Grill
Vinci Restaurant
Lux Bar
Swirlz Cupcakes
Smith and Wollensky
Tavern on Rush
Ben Pao

Shop til I drop

Yesterday I went to Target to get an air mattress. $104 later I leave Target. How does it happen? Well I bought the mattress but I would need a pump to blow it up so that's another thing and then the pump needs batteries so there's something else and then I thought about how much I love Target's brand of fruit leather so I bought some of those and then I found myself buying more underwear and a couple of bras and there you have $104. Ridiculous isn't it?



I also traded in 4 video games and bought a new one and a previously owned one at the mall. I was sad to discover the health food store I used to go to all the time is now closed down. Oh and I went to the movies at the new theater in Northgate. It is a beautiful theater. Of course because it is brand new and relatively unadvertised so it isn't crowded at all and dirty yet. The chairs were super duper comfy. I liked it.


Today I went to the grocery store and that wasn't too bad but then I went up to the drug store and bought... yet another fan. I now own 6 fans not counting the ceiling fan that is in the kitchen that isn't "mine". Sadly, 3 of those fans don't work. I need to throw them away but I get all bogged down in the "can I throw this away?" question and instead I just store them in my apartment. I keep thinking I can't throw them in the trash and have to find another way to dispose of them but then I don't know what the other way would be. This new fan oscillates. It is the most wonderful fan ever!

I bought Big Brain Academy and Mario Kart for my DS. I spent 4 hours this morning playing Big Brain Academy. It might be an addiction. I like Mario Kart, but mostly I like the regular one and not the challenges. I need to practice the regular way before I get into them too much I think.

What does this even mean?

So I was reading my horoscope and here is what it is for today:

Prepare yourself. The more you've been thinking about doing something 'different' lately -- and the more restricted, controlled and constrained you've been feeling -- the more amazingly erratic your behavior has seemed to the people around you. That's not a reason to stop yourself, however. Every now and then, everyone needs to let go. It's officially your turn, and your turn has only just started.

My turn has only just started? I need to let go? I don't think I've seemed more erratic. How do I know? Whatever. :)

Photojeraphic Pimentos

So when I was a little girl I desperately wanted to go be on the Bozo Show so I could play the Grand Prize Game. If you didn't do well you got a 'photojeraphic pimento' of your time on the show. I totally didn't get that it was taped in Chicago and couldn't understand why we couldn't just go there. That's a long explanation that has nothing to do with this photo. :)

So obviously this is a photo from Disney World. I think my sister is about 3 which would have made me between 7 and 8. My mom posted an unedited version of this on her facebook account and I pulled it from there and ran it through photoshop. It helped quite a bit actually since her photo was faded and somewhat red. My actual point to all of this... for those of you with families. Take family photos. This may honestly be the only family photo we have that my sister is in. That's a little sad if you think about it. We took a bunch the last time I was visiting my parents for Christmas, but obviously it isn't the same.

Denver

I'll upload my photos tomorrow. I feel like the interview went well. I have such a hard time with them. I answered all their questions. It only took like 45 minutes... I don't know if that's good or bad. I think the interviews were only slated to be an hour anyway. I don't know why I'm having such a hard time finding a place that doesn't have a decision making disability. They are going to be making a decision in the next week or two and then decide on the next steps. I could be waiting until July for Christ's sake. That's just too long.

Another problem... I don't know how I feel about Denver. Denver is far more like Arizona than I could have imagined. I can't figure out if that's a strike against it or not. While walking around the Denver Botanical garden, I was in this one section that reminded me so much of scout camp in AZ I was transported back to being a camp counselor years and years ago. We used to smell the trees and some were vanilla trees and chocolate trees. I don't know but the kids swore they smelled it. I leaned against a tree and smelled. I could almost smell the vanilla.

This morning in Denver was great. Went to the Botanical Garden and it was gorgeous, but by mid afternoon I didn't know what to do with myself. That's why I schedule myself so much more carefully. I just get agitated. Now I'm not sure if my questioning of Denver is due to residual agitation about driving all over Denver looking for something to entertain me that would have killed an hour and a half. I don't know.

Struggling

There are two things I'm really struggling with with this whole job search.

1 - I'm trying very hard not to panic and just apply for anything I see. I have been very thoughtful in only applying for jobs that are at my level and in places I want to live. I did apply for two jobs that are a step back. I had good reasons for both. Job a - with firemen. That's all there is to it. :) Job b - is a combined comp & benefits position and I have no hands on comp experience so I thought this might be a good way to get into the comp aspect of things. Interestingly enough, those two jobs are the only ones that have led anywhere yet. I'm still optimistic though. :) I just applied for 3 more jobs this evening and the first 4 candidates we've interviewed in my office for the new boss job have all fizzled out. My boss seems to clearly suck at phone screens. So I'm presuming, hopefully not incorrectly, that my pay cut won't actually occur until the new person starts. Fingers crossed.

2 - The other hard part for me is the whole dishonesty about the whole job search. Honestly, people usually are job hunting in secret. So I put on this very public face of I'm coping well and being a team player and professional and all that while planning on leaving the moment I can. It bothers me a little bit.

3 - I am finding it really hard to give a rats ass about most things. Now that I have a plan in place to leave, I find I couldn't care less about a lot of things I should. I'm going to have to fight harder against that because I still have to do my job.

I blame Sookie Stackhouse

For the fact that I accomplished nothing today. I started watching True Blood after realizing Anna Paquin is in it. I like her acting a lot so I decided to watch a few episodes On Demand. True Blood, for those without HBO, is a show about vampires and other supernatural creatures. I forget how I discovered the shows were based on books (I think they might show a little thing when the episode first starts or ends) but I decided to check out the first one. I was hooked. The Southern Vampire Mysteries are much better than that other big vampire series. :) They are really rather short reads - the first book is 292 pages - and they are quick to boot. The basic premise of the stories is that vampires have come out of the coffins because Japan has invented a synthetic blood that allows them to get the nutrition they need without drinking from people. So now they go out at night and associate with people. Sookie is a small town waitress in Louisiana and meets one and has all sorts of adventures due to her ability to read minds. Regular people don't like her either because they know what she can do or just because they think she's crazy. On the show, they followed the book somewhat. The basic premise of the first season follows the first book although there were definitely places of digression and addition. I just watched the 2nd season premiere and they've gone way off the original books but that's okay. It was still a pretty good episode.

I bought a new gray pin striped suit yesterday. I'm going to take a picture of me in it as soon as I find my camera. :) I like it. I think it is slimming. It was originally priced really expensively - $300 (ok that's expensive to me, maybe it isn't really expensive). It was marked down to $122 which is a good deal. I've never owned something so elegant. :) I just have to figure out how to get it to Denver so I can change into it when I get off the plane and after lunch and it won't be wrinkley. I do have one of those squishy hanging bags... Do the stewardesses only hang those up for first class? Hmm...

Poke me in my head

I think my acupuncturist thinks my pain is psychosomatic. Or maybe not that but he seems to believe I'm a big ball of tension. He's probably right. Friday he did the pin thing and since I always ask when he puts them in weird places I asked what each of the different pins do. So he put one in the top of my head (although how did he know where to put it?) and two in the back of my neck, three on one wrist and two on my other hand, one in my elbow and one on the top of each foot. The purpose of all of those... relaxation. And yet still... spent most of the time either jiggling one of my feet (not my fault... he puts one into this spot on my back which totally kills my hip and makes my foot fall asleep) or tapping my fingers. (Unrelated to this... I don't think I like Eva Longoria however I do have a weird little crush on the freecreditreport guy). Hopefully when Denver and Pittsburgh both offer me jobs (because why wouldn't they, I rule! Which I might be crushed if neither even offers me a next interview) and I get to quit this job I will be a little less tense. Of course I'll have a whole different source of tension - moving - but let's not think about that, shall we?

I spent the afternoon going to and from Bremerton on the ferry. Whilst in Bremerton I volunteered for the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society Poker Run and Regatta. It was pretty fun. I spent the afternoon on a dock handing out envelopes with cards in them to boats who came by. It wasn't too hot outside which was nice.

Honesty... is such a blah blah blah

One of the things that has been annoying me about this job search is the question about why I am interested in relocating to xyz location. I frequently give some vague answer about being nearer to family or whatever. I think I'm going to revise that policy and instead I'm going to give the honest answer: After researching possible locations that I may decide to move to xyz city has appeal based on several criteria including being large enough to support the size of industry that would need to employ a benefits manager yet not so large as to be impersonal or intimidating, four seasons for the northern locations, warmth for the southern ones, near a large body of water for those that are or near mountains, a lower cost of living and at least on paper decent public transportation. Other good factors of xyz city include a hockey team (Denver, Austin, Pittsburgh, Milwaukee, Chicago) as well as cultural opportunities so that I may continue my volunteering endeavors. Again depending on location I may expand on that and say near enough to places like NYC and Boston (again Pittsburgh) without actually being NYC or Boston. I think this might be the more well thought out answer and may make me shine a bit in their eyes. :)

The other part of the question I'm starting to get annoyed by... what kind of support system I'll have. Let me worry about that. I've moved more than once with one person or less as a support system in place... I'm not too worried about that now.

So Happy

I had a dream this morning that I really didn't want to wake up from. The funny thing is, when I look at the pieces of the dream, I can't figure out why I was so happy in it, but I really was.

I dreamed I was back with an ex-boyfriend. In my dream I was younger than I am now. We were living together with my parents. But these parents weren't my real parents they were just dream parents. For some reason I drove him back and forth to work. (Really in retrospect it sounds rather ghetto). He worked in a PR company that was huge and he worked in a giant room that was kind of like those 50's movies about the future and automatons... just a big room with a big screen and a boss on the screen but the workers were all scurrying around doing their work. So for some reason I sneak in to see him and give him something and in the process I end up sneaking out several tubes of lipstick and nail polish. All very red shades. That was very vivid... the red. I have to sneak back out down a spiral staircase and then past a big desk to go back to my car. All very weird.

Red: Red is an indication of raw energy, force, vigor, intense passion, aggression, power, courage and passion.The color red has deep emotional and spiritual connotations. Consider the phrase "seeing red" to denote anger.
Red is also the color of danger, shame, sexual impulses and urges. Perhaps you need to stop and think about your actions.

Ex: To dream about your ex-boyfriend/girlfriend or that you and your ex got back together again, suggests that something or someone in your current life that is bringing out similar feelings you felt during the relationship with your ex. The dream may be a way of alerting you to the same or similar behavior in a current relationship. What you learn from that previous relationship may need to be applied to the present one so that you do no repeat the same mistake. Alternatively, past lovers often highlight the positive experiences you had with that person. It could also signify aspects of yourself that you have x'd out or neglected. To dream that you are making out with your ex, signifies your acceptance of certain characteristics of your ex. The dream does not necessarily mean that you want to get back together with him or her. Consider what were the things you liked and disliked about him. These are the same qualities that you are finally acknowledging within your own self.

Lipstick: To buy, see, or wear lipstick in your dream, suggests that you are not entirely truthful about something.

Stealing: To dream that you are stealing, denotes that you are deprived and where the stealing takes place (at home, the office, at school....) is indicative of your neediness. Alternatively, it may signify unrealized and unfulfilled goals. You may have set your goals too high.

Poor Ghetto Sampson*

So this morning the first time I woke up (4 AM after going to bed at 1 AM thank you heartburn. :S) I came out to the livingroom after the pepcid I took did not help. While I was out here playing on the computer I discovered that the right hand bottom corner of Sampson's monitor (which had been steadily breaking) finally gave up the ghost. So now it is a little hard to open and close the computer. So in an effort to repair him I was going to use black electrical tape to hold the corner on better. Sadly, I can't find it (or maybe I used the last of it?) so now... masking tape. Seriously if he were hanging out at the high school the other kids would really pick on him.

*Sampson is the name of my current laptop. You may or may not recall that I name certain products that I may some day need to yell at or beg and plead with... Sampson the computer, Pip the iPod, Ben the Bronco, Jakob the old laptop. So far the Kindle doesn't have a name yet but that's because I haven't thought of one I like.

It's on the list

Unrelated to anything, I'm totally Jon & Kate's bitch this weekend. I am embarrassed by how many hours I watched their show over the weekend. It is ridiculous!

So Michelle and I have been discussing which states are on the list or not on the list as possible places to move to. Apparently, though, we can't remember usually which ones are in which catagory. :)

On the list: Colorado, Texas, Tennessee, Georgia, Missouri, Pennsylvania, Maryland, North Carolina, South Carolina, Minnesota, Wisconsin, Utah, Idaho, Virginia, Maryland,

Not on the list: Arizona, California, Alaska, Hawai'i (would be so fun but TOO expensive), Arkansas, West Virginia, Mississippi, Louisiana, Florida, New York, New Jersey, New Hampshire, Maine, Vermont, Connecticut, Rhode Island, Massachusetts, Ohio, Indiana, Michigan, Oklahoma (too windy), Nevada (too hot and expensive), New Mexico, Illinois, Kentucky,

On the hmm, but probably not list: Alabama, Oregon, North & South Dakota, Nebraska, Kansas, Wyoming, Montana, Iowa,

There's no real logic here truthfully... well there is. A lot of the northern states are out because of their cost of living and high taxes. That's Michelle's beef (not that I disagree, but I've lived in a state with no state taxes and I don't own property so property taxes have not impacted me either, so I don't see it). A few that are nos are strictly due to my own prejudice... I just can't live in Arkansas or West Virginia. And those on the probably not list are there because I doubt there will be the type of employment Michelle's husband would need so I'm not bothering to apply there either. Illinois is technically on Michelle's no list, but I've applied to a job or two there. There's one job I would LOVE from there (Ok I don't know if I would love it. I could get in and hate it but I THINK I would love it) and that I would take in a heart beat. Of course .. there is always finding a new job here, but given that I've seen 1, that's ONE, job posted for what I do in my own area I'm not holding my breath. Although I did get contacted by a recruiter for a job in Tacoma. That would be a suckyass commute and I'd eventually have to move south I'm sure. Although if I'm thinking I'm moving in the next 6 -8 weeks I have got to get moving on getting my shit togther... seriously. (Maybe I'm in denial actually that any of this will happen. That's quite probable. :) )

Random thoughts

If I can't have a baby can I have a puppy?

So it really IS all about that

I was thinking about things to talk about today and really the sad part is I've got nothing... nothing but job searching and how much that sucks and how I hate to be doing it and how there are some things that if I have to leave Seattle I'll really miss. How I'm anxious at the thought of coming in and managing a team I didn't hire. (Since I currently manage one person I did hire). Maybe even one of whom wanted the manager job but didn't get it or couldn't get it. Who knows. And since I work one on one with my employee, how do I fit into a new team? With the exception of the Denver job, I have not applied for any other positions that are a step back. That scares me too. What if I fail? (I know I say in my head all the time What's the worst that can happen, I die? but Seattle seems to have made me more neurotic than I was before. Who knew that was humanly possible?)

But in non-sucky/whiny things... I didn't not get the job in Denver. They had some sort of personnel crisis so they will be letting people know if they are up for next round interviews next week. That could be great. Denver is #1 on my hope list right now.

The job I would love in Chicago keeps getting reposted. I'm presuming that means my lack of project management experience is a negative. :) That's fine. I didn't really even expect an interview for that one but I just imagine I would LOVE it.

Had a good phone screen with a hospital in Atlanta. (Well I think it went well, who knows really). Should hear if I'm selected for next round next week. Since I only applied for them on Friday and she called me on Monday I took that as a positive sign. Which means, really I could have screwed it up. :)

I think job searching this round has been less traumatic for me than last time because I know I'm asking for a lot. I am asking to be relocated in a bad economy. Theoretically there should be people in these places that can do this stuff. Although based on the number of jobs I see reposted in places I don't want to go (or positions that upon reading the description I think no, that's not for me) that may not be the case. I frequently fret that my career path is too niche but maybe that's not such a terrible thing. I also keep reminding myself that my boss posted the new boss job 4/14 and is just this week doing phone screens. This shit takes time, yo.

One thing I could do without... so many of the insurance companies contacting me to sell insurance products. I'm not a sales person. I would never ever want to do that. Even if I could earn upwards of 200k. (Like I believe that).

In other non-sucky/non-whiny/non-job things I'm getting my hair cut and colored tomorrow. Whee! Finally. It is at an awkward in between stage that I really don't like so much. It is constantly held back with a head band because the bangs are long enough to sweep to the bottom of my nose and tickle and itch it but not long enough to tuck behind my ears. I can't decide if I go back to short short because I'll be doing interviews and want to look my best or if I get some sort of in between maintenance done and call it good because I want to grow it back out. Decisions decisions. Also sometime after payday (I was supposed to do this this month) I've got to field trip to the Bellevue fatchick store so I can buy a new interview outfit.

Job hunting is for the birds

Well I'm pretty sure the job I was trying to get a 2nd phone interview is out. I haven't heard from the recruiter in like a week and the phone interview I was supposed to have didn't happen because the hiring manager was sick. I noticed yesterday that the job was re-listed online so I'm fairly certain that means no. That's okay though. I wasn't sure I wanted to move to San Antonio. Currently the order of hope goes like this: that specific job I applied for in Chicago, a job in Denver, anyplace that isn't Texas and then Texas.

I am hoping to hear today on a possible 2nd interview for a job in Denver. It is technically a step back and yet... yet pays the same or more than I currently earn. I know it isn't a great career move to move backwards, but I'm about to anyway so why not do it while working for firemen? And working for firemen for the same amount of money I currently earn. That's the most important part. Oh wait, working for firemen for the same amount of money I currently earn in a city with a lower cost of living THAT'S the important part. Rock on. :)

I'll keep applying to any job I see that is on the approved locations list and seems like I could and do want to do it. I am really hoping I can get out before my new boss is hired. I'm not sure I could train this new person. I'm pretty sure I can't. Ok I could. I just would hate it. And would have to fight pretty hard to not be bitter. Luckily we can't actually make the hire until our office moves since there is no space for this new person. We keep being told we're moving in July, but I'm not holding my breath.

Taxiscam

I just spent an outrageous amount of money on a taxi home from pouring beer. As I was walking down Phinney (I think) in Fremont, I saw the bus go by on 34th. As I got to the stop it was long gone and a quick perusal of the bus schedule indicated the next one was 45 minutes later. I couldn't believe that spending 45 minutes outside in Fremont at midnight was the best plan ever so I caught a cab. So not only was I paying x amount per mile, I also noticed that the meter counts time as well. I was a little peeved. But since it is a rare luxury I'll get over it.

Pouring beer was pretty fun but not as fun as usual. I was at a brewery that wasn't that popular. It is a common Seattle brand so not a lot of people would come by. They can get that anywhere. There were a few people. People who have been drinking can be kind of funny people... funny in their own minds. This one guy with big hair kept coming back to get beer from me. He would always pretend he hadn't been by already for the exact same glass he was getting. He also pretended to give me a token instead of actually doing so. Towards the end of the evening, there was another guy who spent about 15 minutes griping about the box the beer comes in. Apparently they changed their box style and he was unhappy with the new marketing. He was VERY drunk. He finally left me and went over and harangued the yelp lady for another 10 minutes. One other guy was asking about volunteering and he asked what would happen if a person signed up for a Sat shift and then got their free beer on Friday night and then didn't show up for their shift. I said that you're inviting bad karma with that and you end up with your girl friend breaking up with you... and an STD. His friend busted out laughing and he looked mock offended. It was quite funny. All in all it could've been worse. :)

A movie review or two

Do you think Michelle Pfeiffer is embarrassed by Grease 2? I love this movie, but if I recall, it isn't considered such a great movie.

Thursday former student worker came in to my office and was asking about some contraption being built in a neighboring park. I didn't know what it was but a quick google search let me know it was a set for Daedalus Rising by the Annuki Project. It seemed interesting so I asked Stephen if he wanted to go. It was supposed to have aerialists and fire artists and it seemed cool. I am apparently not so into peformance art. I disliked the first performance a lot. The second one was okay. The third went on way too long. The fourth had potential I think... but failed to live up to it and we bailed before the fifth really got started. Actually now that I think about it, I think the fourth also sucked. I needed a lot more dangerous stunts than people just hanging on a trapeze in positions I could probably do.

In good things, though, I went and saw Wolverine today. I really liked it. I thought Leiv Schreiber did a great job as Sabretooth. He's got that kind of malicious creepy down quite well. The movie was paced quickly. I think it has a running time of 1 hour 48 min and it pretty much GOES the whole time. And for those of us not comic book geeks, it was an interesting tale of how Wolverine becomes who he is with a little about Scott (Cyclops) thrown in for good fun.