So like an idiot I say if she wanted to do a team I'd sign up with her. And like an idiot she agreed. And then I did it. I signed up for a fucking marathon. What was I thinking? I'm not a runner. I don't have a runner's body.
This is me. Well technically this is me like 3 years ago, but you get the picture. This is not the body of a runner. This is the body of a Polish field worker (which I know because I am built like my grandmother and as I've heard many times over from my mother, who rants about this after hearing a news story about slavery reparations or the atrocities visited upon Native Americans, our people were still plowing away in fields in Poland during the time all that bad stuff was happening in the states so a Polish field worker I am). (At least I think that's what she says, I tend to tune out)
I will say that although this is me 3 years ago, this is still pretty much me now since I can still wear both that pair of capris and that tank top. So this is me.
This woman, now she's a runner. She may eat cupcakes once in awhile, but you can be sure she's earned the damn thing.
(Image pilfered from Ultimate City Fitness website who probably pilfered it from someone else.)
But I have now committed to doing a marathon. And since I have paid a ridiculous amount of money and it doesn't even include park tickets or a hotel room I'm doing it. I have a training program downloaded from Disney's website. It is a 19 week program that, theoretically, should have me up to 13.1 miles by the end of it and at a pace that won't get me stuck on the golf cart of shame. I actually have more than 19 weeks, 32 by my count, and so I am hoping I can improve time and endurance during the part after I get to running 13 miles.
Let me repeat that in case you missed it: RUNNING 13 MILES!
Well, I don't have to RUN all 13 miles. All I have to do is have a 16 minute mile and I won't get picked up by the golf cart of shame. (Really I need to shoot for a 14 minute mile. I feel 100% certain I have never in my life run a 14 minute mile) (really)
So my goal in all this is to complete the damn race and not end up riding in the golf cart of shame. Organizers of a marathon have a time you have to finish by (we get 3.3 hours for this 13 miles). If you are not at a pace to complete that in time they will pick you up. I've seen it at the marathons I've volunteered for although those are usually vans of shame because we're out on public streets. I want to finish. I just want to finish.