Friday, July 30, 2004

Transcription & naps & stuff oh my!

One of the things I'm volunteering to do right now is transcribe these interviews done for a documentary.  They are really interesting what I've gotten though thus far, but they are really hard to do.  You wouldn't believe how much people repeat themselves and use um, like, uh... Conversation on TV doesn't do this justice.  I've spent about an hour and I think I've gotten through about 15 minutes of tape (maybe less than that :'( ).  I have to rewind a lot because this woman talking uses a lot of big words and repeats herself a lot. 

I took a nap before the woman delivering the tapes visited.  You, dear readers, may or not know that I take a nap almost every afternoon after work.  I think because I go to bed so late and get up so early I need this nap time.  I want to get out of the habit but I just fall asleep on the sofa, so I've started giving into the temptation.  

Finally, MattyP and I are going to the arboretum this weekend.  I'm pretty stoked because it is supposed to be beautiful there and the hydrangea are in bloom. 

Gay boys & inevitability

Not actually related though...

One of my favorite things about hanging out with gay boys is watching their body language.  Men, in general, aren't subtle... put two of them together ha!  all pretense flies out the window.  They are constantly doing the one over to each other, without any trace of hmmm... I don't know what word I want here but... without any trace of subtlety.  Just the blatant head nod.  And usual eye stop... right there.  At least str8 men can pretend they are kind of looking at your face when they're really glued to the cleavage... but gay boys... can't hide it, they're looking at the package.  It just amuses me. 

inevitability... I was hanging out tonight waiting for the phone to ring... I am volunteering to transcribe some cassettes for a documentary.  The script supervisor was supposed to call this afternoon.  I sat and waited until 7:30, then I left to go out.  Of course... apparently, the phone rang at 7:36.  inevitable. 

Wednesday, July 28, 2004

Couple little things...

So today I bought my supplies for my sewing class next week.  We will be making simple drawstring pants.  I picked a bright and cheery yellow cotton.  Katiegirl would be so proud of me.  When I was in college, I hated the color yellow, now I'm finding I quite like it.  Probably a sign.  I am much happier, cheerier than when I was in college.  It took me a long time to finally make a material decision.  I wanted something fun but not TOO fun... no puppy dogs, no origami cranes (although I did keep looking at them).  This yellow is kind of like a faux finish yellow so it isn't like this bright solid yellow. 

My boss stopped in today for a visit.  She REALLY doesn't want to return to work.  She said it like 3 times in conversation and mentioned that she would like to be laid off or fired.  sigh.  When will she just accept her destiny.  STAY AT HOME!  6 more weeks until she returns.  Six more weeks for her to figure this out... Keep fingers crossed!

Tuesday, July 27, 2004

Welcome to the 30 club!

Welcome to the 30 Angst Club Katie Girl!
Katiegirl will be turning 30 this July 30th.  She lives in Vermont with her husband and their 2 children... Her husband joined the 30 club in March (before me, poor boy).  Katiegirl is a longtime reader, although how she finds the time I don't know.  The small people who live in her house are almost 2 and almost 4 (I think...).  Once my boss decides she can't go back to work, and I can have her job (fingers crossed) hopefully I can pull together some money and go visit those wild & crazy kids.  :)  Maybe sometime in 05 or 06 or you know for Giavanni's (the younger one) high school graduation.
This leaves us with Michelle joining the club in September and our friend Janel (of nightmare fame) not getting there until next year I think. 


So I read other people's blogs periodically... they're interesting and obviously other random people read mine.  One that I read has a fascinating thing (for lack of a better word) going on.   It was an LJ (Live Journal) where they have friends listed etc.  I have been reading this couple's individual blogs (they have 'friended' each other).  The interesting part was that periodically one would post about the other.  Mostly the guy was posting about his anxieties with his (then) girlfriend of 3 years.  How he knew he didn't love her and wouldn't stay with her forever.  I suspect, although do not know this for sure, that this was a passive aggressive way of him to try to convince her to break up with him first.  They just broke up and yet both are still on the other's friends list... (not that you have to be on their list since all these are public postings).  So they can read what the other is saying... it is all very weird I think... yet strangely fascinating.  Neither posts enough to be REALLY interesting though.

My new two least favorite questions... So have you heard from (yourboss)?  um no... So when is she coming back?  (In my mind I always think, NEVA if my offerings to the gods are accepted... first born child, check they can have it... I can be celibate if that's the price... )

Gym Peeve

So they are working on the gym right now and instead of closing it down while they do it, they are just working around the people.  Thus far 4 out of 5 elliptical trainers are broken, 4 out of 6 treadmills are broken and the scent of polyurethane in the building is overwhelming.

Random other peeve... blogger spell check (which does not recognize blog or blogging) also does not recognize polyurethane.

Monday, July 26, 2004

A couple random things for a Monday morning..

I keep finding random bits of glass around my apartment.  The sucky part, I find them the hard way, in the bottoms of my feet.  I don't have any idea what it could be from.  Bax hasn't broken a glass in a very long time.... (Bax usually knocks my glasses off the bookshelf that acts as my end table and every so often she manages to knock one off just exactly right to break it).  One of the shards of glass I found had been in my foot so long my skin had started to grow over it.  It was kinda cool kinda gross...

So I think I'm down a pant size now.  I tried on 3 skirts in my official size and all were too big.  But I put on my regular jeans and one pair is just right the others are too big.  Hmmm... One of my biggest problems with buying 'plus' sized clothes is that they are designed for someone with hips.  I have none, not being built like that.  So one of the skirts I tried on had this weird jutting out where presumably a fatchicks hips would go, but on me it just looked weird.  HOWEVER even if I am down a pant size, I looked in the mirror at Ross Dress For Less... it doesn't look like there is any change, or if there is yikes.. :( 

Sunday, July 25, 2004

Firefighter thing

So the nice thing about the firefighter thing is that it was in a hotel which is air conditioned!  Wahoo!  I was on coat check, but obviously since it is 80+ degrees outside there aren't a lot of coats to check.  I ultimately ended up helping with the sorting and filing of the auction slips.  It was a pretty good time altogether.  I saw Trista & Ryan.  She is the tiniest person ever!  She has a fabu body too.  This young volunteer asked for their autograph and that was so cute to see.  I also saw Richard Karn.  He is looking much slimmer since his Home Improvement days, but still the same hair & beard.  The auction raised about 87k.  They were hoping for more, though.  I got to talk to several nice people.  All in all a pretty good time.  The only bad thing is that they didn't serve any food to the volunteers that I could eat and I didn't eat before I left so when I got home I was starving!  I don't know what I was thinking not eating.  I never usually trust these volunteer events where they feed us will have food I can eat.  Now I'm eating hunk o' red meat. Yum... red meat is YUMMY. 

Saturday, July 24, 2004

Fucking Hot!

When I woke up at 6:00 this morning it was already hot in my apartment!  I can't cope.  I fled AZ to get away from this crap.  Luckily it will only be a few days, but... a few may be too many.

Other news...

I signed up for a sewing class today.  Just beginning sewing and on a machine, but I will get to make a pair of drawstring pants. :)  This is towards my goal of learning to quilt.  If I find that I have the patience and ability to do this, so it is good to start small.  I start stuff all the time but never manage to finish... sigh. 

I went out tanning today.  I spent a whopping 20 minutes outside.  I can only do that much for several reasons.   1 - since I am the whitest white that ever did white, I will burn if I try to tan much longer than that... I'm now not snowball white but snowball with a few pale brown specks white... (since I only freckle).  2 - I get overheated.  One of the hardest things about me living in Arizona was that I would get overheated at the drop of a hat. I spent many a summer day sun sick after spending the previous day doing something fun in the sun.  & 3 - I get bored.  Maybe I'll try again tomorrow.

Volunteering news - I am volunteering tomorrow night for a firefighter gala.  I will be doing coat check for an auction and fancyass dinner.  Dinner of the $150/plate variety.  I'm kind of excited because well, yum firefighters. :)  It supports their charity and is in conjunction with a big golf game that is happening tomorrow.  Hypothetically there may be some minor celebrities there.  (Does Trista Rehn and hubby whatever his name is count as a minor celebrity?)  Richard Karn (formerly of Home Improvement & presently Family Feud) will be there as it is his golf tournament. 

Finally, I have convinced Vlad to volunteer with me.  We will be doing the Seattle Paint Out in August.  This is where we go and clean up graffitti in our neighborhoods.  Recently while V & I were out walking, we were discussing volunteering and he said that he would help with a project if it got rid of the graffitti.  I reminded him yesterday of this discussion.  He thinks I tricked him, but he is going.  I am slightly shocked.  The Paint Out gets a ton of support from area businesses so we will get lunch from a local place and on Sunday, there is a banquet/celebration where it is catered by a restaurant and a bunch of door prizes are given out.  It will be fun I think. 

Friday, July 23, 2004

Yet another nightmare...

A couple of people have suggested that the nightmares I've been having lately are related to how hot it is here.  Damn heat! Damn living in a place where we don't have airconditioning because it only gets like this once in a while... Anyway on to this morning's dream...
My friend Janel had died.  I was living with Michelle in a dorm (although not any at UAF I don't know where we were) and it was time to move out of the dorm for the year so we were supposed to be packing.  All I could think about in the dream was Janel and her two sons and her husband (which given that the boys didn't come along until well after college is a bit weird.. as though the dream wasn't weird...).  I was so distraught and crying the whole dream.  At one point I went to the student counseling center but they couldn't help me and only offered me a plate of bacon.  For the first time in a long time my alarm clock actually woke me up (usually I wake up before the alarm and just let the alarm warn me about when to get out of bed.).  I got up to go to the gym, but was so distraught I couldn't bear to go so I went back to bed and slept fitfully for another hour and a half.  So... tells me:

Moving: To dream that you are moving away, signifies your desire or need for change. It may also mean an end to a situation or relationship and your are moving on. Alternatively, it indicates your determination and issues regarding dependence/independence.

Death: To dream about the death of a loved one, suggests that you are lacking a certain aspect or quality that the loved one embodies. Ask yourself what makes this person special or what do you like about him. It is that very quality that you are lacking in your own relationship or circumstances. Alternatively, it indicates that whatever that person represents has no part in your own life. 

Dorm: To dream that you are in a dormitory, represents the value you place on knowledge and education. You believe that you are always learning and not just in the classroom. If you are currently a college student who live in a dormitory, then this symbol may just be a reflection of your current surroundings and hold similar meaning as a house.
Bacon: To see bacon in your dream, symbolizes essentials, staples, and life's supply. It may also be a play on the common phase "being home the bacon" to refer earning a living.

Crying: To dream that you are crying, signifies a release of negative emotions that is more likely caused by some waking situation rather than the events of the dream itself. Your dream is a way to regain some emotional balance and a way to safely let out your fears and frustrations. In our daily lives, we tend to ignore, deny, or repress our feelings. But in our dream state, our defense mechanisms are no longer on guard and thus allow for the release of such emotions.

To wake up crying, suggest the grieving of your soul and that you need to change your ways.  (apparently I did not change my ways from the last time I had the crying dreams)

To dream that no one hears or responds to your cries, represents your helplessness and difficulties and frustrations in trying to communicate with others. You feel that your words are falling on deaf ears. Perhaps your dream is telling you to be more vocal and work harder to get your point across.

Michelle, Care to take a stab at this?

Random Potentially Racist Question...

Is there a reason Asian restaurants can't take the chicken fat off the chicken before serving it?  I was eating Vietnamese cuisine today and kept getting gross slimy chicken fat in my mouth.  YUCK!  (ok ok I do realize that with quantity cooking blah blah blah but still...)

Thursday, July 22, 2004

Boring Gym Stuff redux

So today I went to the gym and was a wee bit sad to discover that my gym buddy flaked again this morning.  That's Monday she flaked, Tuesday we agreed to skip just because we're tired and today she flaked.  I however, have been faithful to gym schedule (except Tuesday when we both agreed to skip and which is traditionally my day off anyway)... and that's 1/2 the battle right there.   Two very exciting points to share... 1 - I have to do shoulder weight stuff because my shoulders are killing me with the big back pack I carry every day now.  Since we shower at the gym, I now cart my towel, clean clothes, shampoo/conditioner, soap, lotion etc etc etc back and forth to work every day.  I'm discovering my shoulders don't like this so much.  Now I know what all those pantywaist highschool kids complain about with regards to their big back packs.  Anyway way off topic there... I've been doing shoulder weight stuff for the past few weeks.  Shrugs, something called tea cups and a couple of others that involve freeweights.  This week I discovered I was able to move up from 8lb weights to 10 lb weights.  Yippee for me!  The 2nd which I may or may not have shared previously is that I am now able to do 3 sets of 10 leg lifts on the Roman Chair.  I do 2 of those extending my legs out straight and 1 set is knees curled up.  I am very pleased that I can do them without feeling either like I'm going to fall off or die.  I've also upped my weight amount on the torso twist thing (50 lbs here) and the back machine (70 lbs on the back machine baby!)... Now if only the gelatinous blob around my mid section would go away... I'm not asking to be a size 2 or anything, but you know... Of course if I actually restricted what I eat that would help, but nah... I like food too much. :)

Tuesday, July 20, 2004


Yahoo!! (hee because Yahoo owns Launch) Launch FINALLY has some Dave Matthew's band stuff loaded onto their site so I can listen to it at work.  I lurve launch.  Of course it has taken me like 5 years to get my station to almost where I like and I still get crap from them sometimes.

Monday, July 19, 2004

Rattlin' around in my head

I've had a bunch of things rattling around in my head today to post and I just didn't feel like posting them until now... (which means I'll probably forget 1/2 of the things I've been thinking about)
1 - Sometimes I wish upon stars or my pennies in the fountains.  There's so much I don't believe in (god, guns, blah blah blah which reminds me of another random thought that I'll share in a moment).  I find it slightly odd that I so want to believe in wishing on stars.  Too much Disney (my house of worship) I'm sure.
2 - According to the Michigan militia, I am a hmmm... I wish I could remember the word... it was like dereliction of duties (that may have actually been a phrase) because I do not own a gun.  How can I protect my family?  This I learned from my good friend Michael Moore & my new favorite movie Bowling for Columbine (ok probably not my favorite).  The reason we call cops, according to this militia, when there are intruders, is because they have guns.  I really liked how they were doing these interviews so that they would seem less crazy... not so much.
3 - I put on my capri pants (that are relatively new) and was happy to discover that they are a little bit more baggy!
4 - I bought myself some roses tonight.  I love flowers.  I know that they just die blah blah blah, but they really make me happy.  Mr. Future Hypothetical Right had better buy me flowers. :D
5 - I can't believe I almost forgot... but I have a new work stalking victim!  The 3rd cute candidate (the one I liked the best of the 3) got the job and will be starting in Augustish... mmm... stalking victims... :D

Sunday, July 18, 2004

Best 10 Inches EVER!

Would be the new fan I just bought this weekend.  It is a little box fan and it sits in the window of my apartment and just cools everything off so nicely.  V has been encouraging me that a fan would help the outrageous heat my apartment builds up every day because I'm on the 'sunny side' of the building.  Usually I have 2 schools of thought on the fan issue.  I want one but I'm flat broke... or I don't need one it is 55 degrees outside.  Today I decided to break down the fan barrier and buy one.  Actually easier said than done.  Now that my beloved Fred Meyers is leaving the hill, I couldn't get one there.  Bartell didn't have one either.  When walking home, what did I spy?  A display of fans, at Rite Aid.  Yippee!  Only little ones, but it is better than nothing. 
I just watched Bowling for Columbine on Showtime (look, they DO have something worth watching).  It was very interesting.  I cried during the 911 calls from Columbine and the black and white footage of the school cameras.  I think I can get behind his theory about the fact that the US exists in a constant state of fear and this is what causes the US to such a high gun violence rate.   It was alarming to me that in a post 9/11 society (I say that like it wouldn't disturb me in a pre-9/11 society, suffice to say it would) those two boys (both under 18) were able to go into K-Mart and buy all the ammo that K-Mart had that day.   How is this acceptable?  I don't know what a standard hunter would go through in one - two hunting excursions, BUT teenagers can buy ALL the bullets including for handguns that K-Mart has?  I won't stand too long on my soapbox... and I'm sure you can figure out where I stand on this subject.  One of the most traumatic experiences staying with my brother-in-lawwhoIhate (also known as Satan) was opening a closet in the diningroom and seeing something like 6 - 7 rifles.  Then noticing that there was also a handgun on top of a shelf in the living room and upon further exploration another one in their (satan's and my sister's) bedroom.  As a person who has always felt she would never live in a house with guns to find somewhere around 10 of them just casually around was a little disturbing.  It did confirm 2 things... 1 - exbrotherinlawwhoihate is satan and I will NEVER again live in a house with guns. 
Ooh... almost forgot in my rhetoric... V & Matthew (his boyfriend not MattyP) and I went to Bite of Seattle.  It was interesting, but I don't think I'll go again next year.  I really hate crowds.

Friday, July 16, 2004


I woke up this morning at about 2:00 in a panic and full of such despair... At the time, I remembered the dream I was having, although now in the light of day, I can only remember two distinct features... 
  1. My sister was alive.  Not only was she alive, but she was pregnant.
  2. My father was leaving.  This piece is a bit fuzzier actually.  I remember he was leaving and I was in the driveway of my parents' house screaming Don't take my daddy! Then falling in a slump on the oil stained driveway.  That's when I woke up.

There was much more back story before all this, but I can't remember it.  Only the sister and my father. tells me:

To see your dead sibling, relative, or friend alive in your dream, indicates that you miss them and are trying to relive your old experiences you had with them. In trying to keep up with the pace of your daily waking life, you dreams may serve as your only outlet in coping and coming to terms with the loss of a loved one. 

Dreaming that someone has been kidnapped indicates that you are not letting aspects and characteristics of that person be expressed within you. You are trying to contain and/or suppress those qualities of the kidnapped person

Seeing your father in your dream, symbolizes authority and protection. It suggests that you need to be more self-reliant.

To see an oil spill in your dream, suggests that you are in emotional turmoil. You are experiencing problems and distress in your personal relationships.

To dream that you are wearing a cloak, signifies the need for security, warmth and the feeling of being well protected. It may also mean that you are trying to cover-up or hide something.

So if we piece this all together... Well... I don't know what exactly it all means.  Do I miss my sister?  We weren't close, so I don't know.  Christmas 2001 was the last year I saw her before she died in 2002.  Prior to Thanksgiving 2001,  I hadn't spoken to her in like 2 years.  Not because of any rift or anything, but with the 10 year age difference and the vast life experience differences, it was difficult to talk to her.  She was much closer to my younger sister who went through some similar life experiences.  I am also not sure what aspects of my father I may be supressing... He and I are actually remarkably alike, very laid back and easy going.  I am probably more maybe compassionate is the word I want.  He is an almost 70 year old Republican.  He remembers the 40's and is a pick yourself up by your bootstraps kind of guy.  Security and self reliance... that I'll almost buy.  It is a wee bit stressful to think that when it comes right down to it, all I have is me.  I didn't think I was feeling any emotional turmoil.  Things have been pretty good lately.  I think I'll chalk up this odd dream to drunkenness and the downer feeling usually brought on by that.


Tonights WTF moment brought to you by the letters D (for drunk) and T (for tipsey).  So, Vladdy and I were sitting at the counter in RPlace playing trivia when this lesbian Vladdy knows joined us.  I think she was checking me out, but I'm not so vain to think that everyone is in love with me... but seriously... I think she was.  Anyway... she and V start talking about her life.  I glean both from my observation and from her appearance that she is a short (er than me), fat(ter than me), homeless and I believe jobless lesbian, yet, much to my utmost depression, she has a man.  WTF?  Of course, we have not seen said man.  It is entirely possible that he does not exist or if he does he looks like Sloth from the Goonies...

Thursday, July 15, 2004

New Features

I'm not 100% sure I love new features...  It just took me over 15 min to get that other post put up correctly because it kept doing odd things that I never told it to do... making the font tiny... bolding certain parts... centering the whole post.  I'm not that dumb.  I can figure this stuff out.

Yum Cute Candidates

You will have to forgive this post a little bit... I am playing with the new features.  I am excited about them!  I LOVE blogger and would be slightly interested to know how they make their money... Paid blogs I suppose. 
Today's Topics:

  • Yummy candidates
  • People
  • Peaches

Yummy Candidates: So... The past three days I had candidates in my office who were interviewing for a specific position and we were discussing their benefits if they were to be hired.  They were all HOT HOT HOT... And 2 of them were, I remember, super nice.  The other one... all I can remember about him was that he was chewing bright blue gum the entire time we talked.  If he did that while he was being interviewed that would be a huge black mark in my book. 

People: I can't remember what I was going to say about people... Probably something about how they annoy me.

Peaches:  (wow that color is visually difficult).  I am no longer going to bring peaches in my lunch.  Thus far, Monday's peach.. .mealy.  Tuesday's peach I forgot to eat.  Wednesday's peach didn't get brought to work since I ate lunch out on Wednesday.  Thursday's peach... gross, bruised and battered apparently the victim of rattling around in my lunch bag.  Who knew you had to wrap them in bubble wrap to protect their frail little bodies.  To quote Michelle...

Now will you try nectarines?

Michelle's Dream Analysis

The Dream
I was in the elevator at work, heading upstairs from the parking garage. The elevator was basically just a large platform with a vertical metal beam at the back that had the floor buttons on it. I pushed the button for my floor and it light up red. The elevator started moving up and I was thrown slightly off balance. The elevator went past my floor and kept going. It was very high and I was quite nervous about falling off so I held on to the metal beam, closed my eyes and leaned my head against it.

When I opened my eyes again, I was in the sky, so far above the ground that I could only make out geographical features, not buildings. I thought, "I guess this is a flying dream." I didn't seem to be able to fly, though. The elevator was gone, but it still felt like I was being taken somewhere and I was scared that I was up too high. The land was very green with rolling hills like you see in movies about Ireland and Scotland. Turns out, though, that I was going from my building in Santa Monica to Las Vegas. As I was getting closer to Vegas, I began to worry about the landing. I was dumped off in the pool of a fancy hotel. I was meeting some friends there.

I got out of the pool and dried off. I went inside to a lounge just off the pool area. My husband and some friends were in there waiting for me. After I ordered a drink and joined the in-progress poker game, Adam and his wife walked in. They were very excited about the time share they had just purchased.

The Meaning
(according to
--Red: Red is also the color of danger. Perhaps you need to stop and think about your actions.
--Elevator: To dream that the elevator is not letting you off, symbolizes that your emotions have gotten out of control.
--Machinery: To see machinery in your dream, suggests that you are going about your way without much thought. You are making decisions without thinking it through.
--Flying: If you are feeling fear when you are flying or feel that you are flying too high, then it suggests that you are afraid of challenges and of success.
--Pool: To see a pool of water in your dream, denotes that you will find much happiness and pleasure in love and marriage. Your social life will keep you busy.
--Alcohol: To dream that you are enjoying alcohol in moderation, denotes contentment and satisfaction in the decisions that you have made. Chance for success is likely.
--Poker: To dream that you are playing poker, suggests that a situation in your waking life requires strategy and careful planning. You need to think things out before carrying out your actions.
--Time Share: To dream the your friend has purchased a time share means that you think your friend is a hothead who acts rashly, but you like him anyway. Kidding, Adam. Chill.

The Analysis
I started out at work but I made the decision to push the elevator button without giving it any thought. This resulted in the elevator not letting me off which means that my emotions about something are out of control, likely my feelings about not wanting to work anymore, which have been getting stronger lately. Then I was taken out of my workplace and I was fearful while flying, which suggests that I am afraid of challenges and success. Two night ago I had my first screenwriting class to make sure that quitting work next year to get an MFA in screenwriting is really what I want to do. It really is, but that will definitely lead to some uncertainties and challenges. At the end of my flight I landed in a swimming pool at a hotel where my husband and friends were waiting for me. Since seeing a pool in a dream indicates that one will find happiness in love and marriage, I take it to mean that no matter what the outcome of my work or school situations, my family and friends will be around and I will continue to find happiness in that aspect of my life. Since I was enjoying a drink with them which means I was content with my decision and that the chance for success is good, it seems like everything will work out fine, even if it is challenging and frightening along the way. The poker game was like a final warning to think things through and plan carefully before making big decisions.

Wednesday, July 14, 2004


Eeeek!! I just ralized that if I do this MPA program, I am going to have to stick to this job for at least 3 years to do it. Yikes... that's a commitment. I don't know if I'm ready for it... Info session tonight, I'm nervous... very nervous. It has been a long time since I did real school work.

I went to the info session after work. It seems like this will be a good program for me. I think this is the direction I want to go with my future. I have to start working on my application. If I want to enter for the fall, I have to get the paperwork in as soon as I possibly can. I have to come up with my two letters of reference. I hate having to have people do that.

Should I get another pet?

Baxter actually answered that question tonight. There was an email on my ferret list from a person who was looking for a place for her ferrets for just tonight and tomorrow. So I called this person and let her know I would let the pair stay with me and Bax. So she comes over and brings them. We let them wander around individually and one of them was fairly aggressive towards Bax. I haven't seen her since. She is hiding out in my bedroom. I think that much of Baxter's aggressiveness is due to her very small size (small dog syndrome). She is about 1/2 the size of these two ferrets. I think she will be better off being an only fert so I will have to put my kitten want on hold until Bax passes.

Tuesday, July 13, 2004


If I ran the world (maybe that's universe), grownups wouldn't get zits in the middle of their foreheads or on the ends of their noses. (ok grownups wouldn't get zits at all... c'mon I finished adolesence YEARS ago!)

I noticed yesterday as I was watching Dead Like Me (only like 13 days until its season premiere) I realized that my two favorite TV shows right now deal with things I don't believe in. I love Joan of Arcadia. She talks to God... yet it isn't preachy (like 7th Heaven which I wrongly watch mostly because it is such a trainwreck!). It is just a well done show I think. Then there's Dead Like Me which deals with, well death. The main characters are all reapers who 'help' their charges across to the other side. Basically they 'pop' the souls out of the body just before death. It is actually a fascinating concept. That you will meet a person who will touch you a minute or two before you die and they will help release your soul from the physical body. I kind of like how they make each of the doors to the other side significant for the person... It is a nice idea. Maybe someday I'll buy into the whole thing.

Monday, July 12, 2004

Random bits of trivia

While walking home from work today I started chuckling to myself. Now where I live, laughing to oneself isn't that uncommon but, I am usually not this mental. As I was walking I had this flash in my head of a scene from the terribly funny Attack of the 5 ft 2 Woman. I saw it a couple of times in college and it always made me laugh until I cried. So the scene that flashed in my mind was this one with Judy Brown as Lorena Bobbitt. She is in the car holding the 'member' and yelling at it. "You piss me off... You piss me off" It really is a 'you gotta see it' kind of a thing. So I recommend that all of you run right out and rent it.

So for some random reason I'm having a searching for mr. rightish obsession right now. It will pass, it always does... but yesterday I was thinking as I made nachos for the 4th meal in 2 weeks that I should find a nice Mexican guy. I like Mexican food.. then it dawned on me that a real Mexican likes things like mole and menudo... I like food more along the lines of Baja Fresh and packaged sauces. But I did end up eating enchiladas all week last week for lunch and tonight's dinner... tacos. It is obviously a sign... although maybe not, last night's dinner was pork fried rice which will be lunch for the next several days. It could be more of a function of the whole not eating wheat so I can't eat sandwiches and have to come up with meal alternatives. mmm... I lurve me some fake americanized tacos. :D

Two new volunteering things I will be doing this month... 1 will be volunteering at a fireman gala/auction. In my expression of interest, I said I was interested in working behind the scenes and she already wrote back and let me know that there were some behind the scenes jobs open. Yum firefighters. Then sometime in July (hopefully this one is more tentative)I hope to go to Carnation with this volunteer group. They harvest fruits & veggies for farms and the farms donate a portion of what is harvested to our local food bank. It is a good example of the barter system working... The farmers get their crops harvested and the foodbank gets a donation of fresh food.

Final news I think I am going to go back to school for my MPA. SU offers a degree that is practically written for me. Since I work there, I can take classes for free so I should. I am a bit nervous, though. It has been so long since I've had to think or something like that. I'm going to an info session on Wed night. I'll have a better idea then I hope.

Oh final thought... SO I'm all excited about showtime because I can watch Dead Like Me. Well apparently that's all the current stuff they offer. All weekend long I kept looking for something to watch. All their movies were so old... It makes me sad.

Light random mostly uninteresting things...

This morning I was running totally late to the gym. Luckily enough, so was the student worker who opens the gym up in the morning. We ended up just walking several times around the block instead of working out. When we were done (a litle after 7) the gym was finally open, which was good since I needed to shower.

Michelle (and others who know me and know my affinity for odd colored nail polish) will be glad to know that I now limit the bizarre colors (blue, green, black although not silver) to my toes. Right now I'm wearing a very respectable shade of rust on my finger nails... Unfortunately I am wearing it in a very trailer-trashy way because it is completely chipped and should be removed. However, I am noticing that my finger nails are growing fairly nicely right now and that makes me happy.

I bought some beautiful fruit over the weekend, a cantaloupe, watermelon and peaches. I cut up the cantaloupe and watermelon and have been eating it for breakfast and for snacks. I love cantaloupe! The peaches I am taking for my lunch at work. I have a weird thing about peaches. I like the taste of them, but I am not sure how I feel about the skin texture in my mouth. It will take me probably 30 minutes just to bite into this peach today.

Arrrgghh!!! Some people!

You ever have one of those people in your life who just know which buttons to push and pushes them. I've just had a rather long IM convo with someone who does just that. It started out with a conversation about my sex life... big surprise considering who this was... He doesn't grasp why I'm not a big fan of the one night stand. I'm 30 fucking years old... don't you grow out of that shit eventually? (holy cow there'll be much swearing because he has agitated me so much which of course leads me to the questions of 1 - why do I let him piss me off and 2 - let's consider who this person is before I take his opinions seriously enough to make me this angry.) So then we were talking about volunteering and why do I volunteer so much. He knows that money is tight in my world so his simplistic answer is to get a 2nd job or a better 1st job. These are not bad ideas... and not ones that I haven't tried. So I think my agitation comes from two different areas. I can't find a 2nd job and his implication that it should be so easy I should be able to just put my hand out there and anyone is dying to hire me. Let's look at how long it took me to find the 1st job that I have. Eight months to find a job that I hated and over a year to find this one that I like (and if my boss would just accept her destiny to be a stay at home mom I could have her job). I have to back up though before the job convo we were having a discussion about homelessness. He apparently has read a statistic wherein so many homeless choose this lifestyle. While I do not doubt that there are plenty of people on the streets who choose this way, I sincerely doubt the estimated 40% of the homeless population that are FAMILIES choose this route. The fact that to afford a 1 bedroom apartment at fair market value on the average wage right now a person would have to work 89 hours per week... PER WEEK! His answer... they can get two jobs. If they can't find the first job how in the hell will they find a 2nd job? AND if they have children (either singly or with a spouse) who the hell takes care of the kids while they are working these 89 hours per week to pay for their 1 bedroom apartment... When I also pointed out that the homeless have a hard time finding jobs since they don't have an address or phone number to put down... use their welfare checks to get a cellphone. OK... Homeless individuals (approximately 60% of the homeless population) don't get welfare. You have to have kids. And for the average cellphone company, they like an address for you the subscriber. I've forgotten how damn easy it is when you work for the same place you worked for in college! which was 7 years ago! He apparently did work a brief time for someone else... but now... back for the same housing office from his college days. GAH! He was rather surprised to find that if V hadn't gotten this job he just got, V would join that homeless statistic. Michelle (who hopefully doesn't mind too much that I am using her name in vain) looked for quite a while before she got the new job she has now... and part of the thing (but not all of the thing since she really is anal enough to be very good at what she does) that helped her with this job is that she works with people who knew her at her other job lending at least a bit of truth to the "it is who you know". Maybe part of the reason that I get so agitated is that at least on the job front (not on the sex front... his views on sex and my views are about as far apart as possible) is that some of it is what I think. I do think I should get a 2nd job... It does bother me that I owe as much as I do. So hearing it from someone who already annoys me periodically doesn't help. Gah... why do I even bother talking to him? That's the ultimate question.

Sunday, July 11, 2004

Mundane weekend

Contrary to what I'm sure y'all believe, I do lead a pretty boring life. I know that it's hard to tell given all the wild and crazy adventures I speak of oh so frequently, but much of my weekends are spent doing the following: grocery shopping, laundry at 6:00ish Sunday morning, dishes, and Friday dinner of Tacos Del Mar (sometimes Sat dinner depending). This weekend, no real exception. Oh wait... there was one. I took Baxter for a walk. The Bax doesn't especially like going on walks. I drag her out periodically because I think it is good for her. Once we're out, she doesn't mind it. She crawls around in the grass, digs in the dirt, all those cute little ferrety activities. Today we followed some bizarre scent all over the place. I think she thought she was hunting a squirrel. We didn't find it which is probably good for The Baxter because these city squirrels would kick her ass.

Sometimes I have an idea that sounds better in my head than it might actually be. Since March, I've been thinking of getting a kitten. Mostly to join Bax as a playmate but also because The Bax is already 6 and ferrets only have a life span about 7 - 8 years, so in a year or so I get to look forward to another death which may actually break my heart more than Minka's. Anyway, I've been thinking about getting a kitten and I actually emailed someone I found on craigslist (I think I have to give big props to Michelle for hooking me up with this site. I lurve it!) who had an orange male kitten for free. My older sister claimed that boy cats are generally more loving and cuddly than girls. Something about how in the wild cat world, the girl cats go out and hunt and bring the food back for their family and the boys just lounge around. Hence boy boy cats are lazier and more cuddly. So I expressed an interest in a kitten. Then I had expressed interest remorse. I got an email back from the girl and was given a phone number. I waited most of today and finally called. I was relieved to discover that the kitten already found a new home. I would've felt bad if I backed out but that she couldn't find a different person for him. I've seen another kitten group on craigslist and am fighting the urge to email them.

It is kind of funny... major life things, I just do... little random things I'll obsess and think about forever before actually doing it. I've been considering this kitten thing for 4 months. 4 MONTHS (and I'm still waffling on the decision and making the commitment). I considered the tattoo for years before I finally decided to do it and then the design took many many months of consideration too. But the decision to move to Seattle? One random day. I just up and decided to do it. Didn't really obsess about the idea, decided to do it and 4 months later once all the details were ready... did it. Decide to move to CA... Michelle emailed me and just agreed like in one day. So.. I'll probably end up doing a Dharma & Greg thing and get married like 2 days after meeting Mr Hypothetical Right, but obsess for 6 months before buying my first new coffee table.

Friday, July 09, 2004

Phone Numbers

Apparently the person who had the phone number before me had issues. For months after I just moved in, I would get calls for him from all sorts of far away places like Chicago. We would have to go through a series of questions and answers, where I would say "No I'm afraid you have the wrong number." And the caller would say something like... "Well is this 206-555-5555" and I would say "Yes but no one by that name lives here." And then they would ask randomly if I knew where the guy went... "Um no, I don't." "Okay thank you." Then the person would finally hang up. (I know I know I could've hung up right after the i'm afraid you have the wrong number but I'm polite on the phone.) So today I get a message on my voicemail telling me to call "Miss King" at an 800 number. I have no idea who Miss King would be and what she would want but for some reason instead of ignoring it like I usually would, I called. It is apparently the court house or some variation of the courthouse. They were looking for the guy who had my old phone number possibly because he owes them money. So when I called I get surly courthouse worker who says "What number did Miss King call you at" and I told her. She said do you know Joe whateverhislastnameis? And I replied no and she said oh we have the wrong number then. And that was that. I was a bit nervous, though, because the place I called came across as very official and for a brief second I thought there had been some snag in my deferral of my speeding ticket of almost a year ago. I think Miss King isn't a real person, but like a code... I wonder what that guy did.

greener grass

Top 3 Good Things About Being Married
1- The security of having someone else be partially responsible for my well being. If I got laid off or was unable to work or something like that, there is someone else around who can share the load with me and take care of things. I wouldn't have to resort to going back to live with my parents who aren't even going to be around when I get old. (So, this would be a good thing for Joanne whose mom is crazy and both her mom and dad aren't exactly in their youthful prime.) For me, I would not have had this same feeling living with someone who said he was always going to be around but who I wasn't married to, so marriage was my choice.

2- Companionship. It is nice to have someone around to talk to and share things with. I never have to worry about finding someone to do things with when I want to. I have someone who is fairly obligated to do things with me. This is probably the easiest one to get without being married, though. If I was single and had a close girlfriend as a roommate and a good circle of friends? Problem solved. Notice I said "girlfriend", however, I don't think a gay best friend suits the purpose as well. They are great for many things, but there are some things they will never be able to help with. Sending someone to the store for feminine products when I am sick is a good example. Either a husband or a best girl friend would go for me. A gay best friend? Not so much.
(Note: I IM'd my husband and he said that I am the reason he chose married life over single life and that companionship is the #1 benefit.)

3- Physical affection. People need hugs. It is a scientific fact. The cuddling, the snuggling - all very nice. A person doesn't necessarily get sex whenever a person wants it when they are married, but very nearly. Like most things, though, I find that if I can get it whenever I want it, I start to want it less. Still, even disregarding sex, it is nice to have someone around who touches me out of love and affection. This I can get with a boyfriend, but since I am a woman I will find myself thinking neurotic things like, "How come I am always the one who hugs first?" or "Why won't he hold my hand right now?" Things are more certain in a marriage. I am no longer thinking about what he really feels about me. I know. He married me.
(Note: My husband also cites "no more worries about STDs" as a benefit. Nice.)

Top 3 Bad Things About Being Married
1- He is always there. This is the flip side to #2 Companionship above. I am, by nature, a solitary person. My husband is a very social person. I need time alone. I like to be by myself; not all the time, but on a fairly regular basis. The time I spend commuting in my car doesn't count either. I need quality time alone with myself. I used to do a lot more things alone. Work out. Crafts. Write. Clean. This may also be a result of having to commute to work, but honestly, that is one of the bad things about being married, too. If I wasn't married, I would be able to live closer to my job and I wouldn't have to commute and I would have a lot more free time.

2- There is so much stuff to do. Truthfully, I don't know if this is associated with marriage as much as it is with home ownership, but it always seems like there is something to do that has to be done by a certain date looming in the very near future and that isn't necessarily something I want to do. Whether this a result of being married or of owning a home is hard to say, but I wouldn't own a home if I wasn't married. Maybe. About a year before I got engaged, it seemed like my husband (then boyfriend) and I might break-up, so I was living with my parents, paying off my debt, and saving for a condo.

3- Anger. The more you love someone, the angrier you can get with them. There is a special kind of anger that comes only with being married. No one can push me over the edge as much as my husband. Also, I sometimes have to give in on something that I don't want to just because I know that he is getting angry like this and it isn't worth the trouble it is going to cause to stand firm on my position.

Like I said, there are trade-offs. For me, the good outweighs the bad. Marriage isn't for everyone, though. My brother-in-law, for instance, will probably never get married, but there is a good chance he will be with his girlfriend for the rest of his life. I found someone who I feel I can stay with for the rest of my life. I don't believe in soul mates. I don't believe that he and I were meant to be together. I do believe that we are compatible, in love, and committed to making our marriage work. I like being married.

That said, if my husband died or something bad enough happened to make us get divorced, I don't know if I would get married again. Now that I have been married and know what it is like, I can also appreciate the single life more now than when I was living it.

The grass is greener... on showtime?

Two subjects... one post.

Showtime Thanks to my whopping 3.5% increase here at the university, I will be getting roughly a grand 62.00 more take home pay per month. Now while I should do the smart thing and use that extra 62.00 to add to my credit card payments or even you know to live off of since somehow I still run out of money at the end of the month, I am not doing that. No. I am upgrading my cable to allow me Showtime. It is only 15.00 of my whopping 62.00 so there still remains a little extra on the table. :) Now you may wonder why Showtime. Why not the sporn capital of the world Skinimax or maybe the show heavy HBO (there really isn't anything funny about HBO)... I'll tell you why... Dead Like Me. I love this show. Back when I did the failed experiment of getting rid of all of my cable (who was I kidding really?), I didn't reup for the fancy channels I had before. Mostly because the fancy package I had before no longer existed and I was suddenly faced with paying way more than I signed up for. I gave it up. But now that Dead Like Me is coming back, I have to have it. The other plus side, is that for some reason I now get Encore. They each have like 15 channels of movies so perhaps I can finally find something worth while to watch in the evenings (yeah right.). In any case... I am overjoyed to find Showtime back in my life...

The Grass is Greener Earlier today, Michelle and I had a brief discussion about if marriage isn't one of those grass is greener ideas for single people. It is funny because just last night as I was sitting alone on my sofa I thought it might be nice to be married. Periodic bouts of that fantasy (damn you For Better or Worse) notwithstanding, most of the time I can't imagine being married. I would have to give up parts of my life that I'm just starting to relish (not to mention 1/2 my bed, closet, bathroom etc.). Right now I do what I want, when I want, with whomever I want (including move from state to state as randomly as I want). I like that freedom, and while I don't think marriage would require me to give all that up, some level of consideration would have to occur and I would not necessarily curtail my adventures but at least consult with hubby about them. (Well, lets face it, it isn't like I lead some wild swinging life where I do heavy drugs, riot and loot old folks' homes and/or have rampant kinky sex with a bunch of nameless faceless folks... Honestly on that last one if some of you knew how long it has been you would weep for me... :) BUT I would have to do things like dishes on a more regular basis (although that could be dear hubby's chore?)... actually get dressed on the weekend... and probably not let gay boys feel me up. I think the compromise is some long term boyfriend who doesn't live with me. Apparently as I have failed mr. craigslist's personal quiz I will have to seek other venues in which to find mr long term boyfriend who doesn't live with me. Otherwise I have to start obtaining cats.

Wednesday, July 07, 2004

Fun with Personal Ads

I am a huge fan of Craigslist. I read it daily and find it totally fascinating. There are a number of subcatagories on Craigslist that I love. One of my favorites is the missed connections. I think because I am a romantic at heart and I do kind of love the idea of 'they share that look on the subway and...' And they meet and live happily ever after. I don't think I will ever find myself described in there (with the exception of Michelle's post to me since she knew how much I love that section). I also love to read the personals on there. There is such a wide variety of posts. Obviously all the men who post on Craigslist are hot model types seeking the same. Since I am not a hot model type, I mostly just read them and don't bother replying. BUT one today piqued my curiosity. I am fearful that the guy's ad was serious, but it amused me to reply to it anyway. His ad had a list of 10 questions with multiple choice answers. The A answer was clearly doormat 'nice?' girl answers. The B answer was maybe middle of the road but some of them not so much. The C answers were like total harpie bitch answers. He also gave an option for D answers (D being create your own answer..). I seem to have chosen all D ansers. A couple of the question highlights with my answers...
- You meet up with friends for drinks and dinner and you notice him looking down the shirt of one of your big chested friends, you: My answer... D - Never would happen. I have the biggest chest of all my friends. (Random note... I was trying to buy a sports bra in JC Penney. Apparently they put the sports bras for girls my bra size right next to the bras for girls with no size... did you know almost A was a size?)
- You find out he stretched the truth a bit, this
girl he is still in contact with that he claims is
just a friend is really a ex-girlfriend and she’s a
stripper, you: D - I am pissed because he lied (this is not stretching the truth this is an outright lie). I don't mind that he has friends who he may or may not have used to boink... but tell me the damn truth about it. Hoping he keeps that in mind when he finds out about some of the guys I'm still friends with.
- It’s your best friends little sisters graduation party and he gets drunk and
is flirting with all the 18 year old girls, you would: D - Point out that at his age (38) it is creepy pervy to be hitting on 18 year old girls.

The rest of the questions are equally odd... I am almost 100% certain I won't hear from him based on my honest, but probably not girl of his dreams answers.. I'll let y'all know if I do. :)


Sometimes I love voicemail. Especially when I have to call someone and tell them news that they don't want to hear like no, they don't have that benefit because they didn't sign up for it when they were supposed to. When I get the voicemail I could cry I'm so happy because it means I don't have to deal with uberpissed guy. Maybe that's why I'm so sympathetic to the Airline Customer Service workers... I know what it is like to be yelled at by someone for something that was their own damn fault. :)

Adventures in drunkenness

So against my better judgement I went out with the boys last night. I had seriously thought about not going but there was nothing on TV so you know... nothing else to do, why not go drink and have a good time. V and I headed out to RPlace at about 8:30. When we got there, Matty P was also hanging out and playing darts so we joined him. I am usually not a terrible dart player, but I think because I haven't been playing as much lately, I've SUCKED. But it was fun so who cares? :) Two rather startling things happened while I was out. 1 - Jeffy who is a very very attractive (albiet YOUNG) bartender/barback came up to me while I was playing darts. Jeffy is a very touchy person so that's never very surprising. What he did, last night, though surprised me. He came over, pulled away part of my shirt and blew a raspberry in my cleavage. I was just drunk enough to be very slow at reacting and was mostly startled. I dropped my darts and got teased mercilessly by my other boys. 2 - Later, while I was standing with my back to the dart board, leaning on a counter that overlooked the 1st floor someone came up and smacked my ass hard. It totally surprised me (those who know me know how high strung I can be). I hadn't realized anyone was behind me so I squeaked which is a relatively calm response for me. It was the cute str8 bartender. Yum. He and his baby's mama have broken up. A girl can dream can't she. :) After that, the rest of the evening was not at all exciting. We went up stairs after a while and listened to scaryoke. I've never been to str8 karaoke so I have no frame of refrence, but gay karaoke... kind of alarming. These gay boys get up there and diva it up, or they are so drunk you end up with such campy extremely awful karaoke that you just have to laugh. I headed home about 11:30 and fell asleep finally a little after midnight. 5:15 this morning came VERY early. But I did get to the gym on time and did my 40 minutes.

Anyone know anything about spider plants? One side of mine is torturing me with brown leaves. I think I'm overwatering but I don't know. Since it only gets watered when I can remember to do it I'm pretty sure it is feast/famine for the little plant. Hmmm... I may have to Ask Jeeves. I love Jeeves. He's the reason I finally figured out how to get rid of the web search hijacker I had.

Tuesday, July 06, 2004

TV Listings

Why does the cable company even offer TV listings if they are not correct? Three times in the past 2 - 3 weeks I've tried watching VH1's 40 top reality show moments (Ok ok I will admit this is crap but usually I've tried going there because there was nothing else on and hey, that looks kinda interesting). Three times it has been something else, including trauma worthy Fear Factor Behind the Show or some such nonsense which included watching people eat LIVE CAVE SPIDERS! Not only were these spiders horrifying to look at but one with legs wiggling hanging out of girl's mouth? Trauma inducing. I couldn't hit the channel changer fast enough. Last night I went to watch some crap movie on Lifetime (28 Days with Sandra Bullock, I like it sue me and there was NOTHING else on)... No I didn't get to watch it though because it was some frightful movie with a very old looking Kate Jackson. Sometimes I just give up. Even TV has turned against me. :)

The Airline

I find this show FASCINATING. The bullshit airline workers put up with is amazing. It is almost painful to watch because I can't help but think who... who finds these behaviors acceptable. I like to think that perhaps people don't necessarily realize what they sound like. I will be the first to admit that I have had flight issues. The airlines not perfect. They do a lot of things (they being airlines in general not the poor schmo at the ticket counter) that frustrate people, like overbook. But DAMN... Some of these people act like these poor airline workers are out to get them personally. (I've both dated a person like that and my mother IS that person so I find that personality frustrating as hell) It isn't like the airline employee woke up one morning and thought I'm going to hassle the white guy today. Oh no... this blind guy is waiting for his 'blind date' (he is blind) and for a brief moment I was so scared she wasn't going to show up and the poor airline worker would have to console the poor blind guy.

Monday, July 05, 2004

Bad Dream

I had one of the saddest dreams in recent memory this morning, although I did not wake up crying which is nice. In my dream I had cancer and I thought I was in the cancer ward of the hospital but now that I'm thinking about it in the morning I think it was more like a hospice. But there was a room full of us and we were in bunks. The key players are me, a baby, a woman and her son who is maybe 4. The baby dies. That's all I actually remember about the baby. The son isn't sick. He is just there because his mother was there. She was doing well in the dream but got much sicker as the dream went on. At one point in the dream, she collapsed. The nurses/drs came in to take care of her and the little boy was so scared. So I went over and comforted him on his bunk bed. Then there was a barbecue but I was actually reading a book about a woman who was preparing to die. I guess I was preparing to die. It was altogether a depressing dream.

According to my good friends at

Cancer: To dream that you have cancer, denotes hopelessness, grief, self-pity, and unforgiveness. You feel you are wasting your life away. This dream also represents areas in your life which are bothering you, disturbing you, and hurting you in some emotional way.

Die: To dream that you die in your dream, symbolizes inner changes, transformation, self-discovery and positive development that is happening within you or in your life. Although such a dreams may bring about feelings of fear and anxiety, it is no cause for alarm and is often considered a positive symbol. Dreams of experiencing your own death usually means that big changes are ahead for you. You are moving on to new beginnings and leaving the past behind. These changes does not necessarily imply a negative turn of events. Metaphorically, dying can be seen as an end or a termination to your old ways and habits. So, dying does not always mean a physical death, but an ending of something.

On a negative note, to dream that you die may represent involvement in deeply painful relationships or unhealthy, destructive behaviors. You may feeling depressed or feel strangled by a situation or person in your waking life. Perhaps your mind is preoccupied with someone who is terminally ill or dying. Alternatively, you may be trying to get out of some obligation, responsibility or other situation.

Barbecue: To dream of a barbecue, refers to a minor problem that is affecting your social life.

Book: To see books in your dream, indicates calmness. You will advance toward your goals at a slow and steady pace. Books also symbolize knowledge, intellect, information and wisdom. Consider the type of book. It may represent a significant calling into a specific field of work.

Hmmm..So apparently I feel bad about myself but that's changing?

July 4th

Happy Independence Day! :)

Well, surprisingly enough, a geeky idea I had actually came to fruition. I wanted to go to the Family 4th of July at GasWorks Park and watch the fireworks. I suggested it to V et al and expected V to flake. Not only did he not flake, but we had a good time and a crowd of people. We were joined by his boyfriend Matthew, Matthew's roommate Sunny, Dana, and a couple of old friends of V & Dana's, John, Nicole, their son John and Nicole's brother. It helps that Vladdy actually knows people since I don't. We went to the store ahead of time and bought a bunch of food. Too much food, but that's okay. We had a nice picnic on the grass. The fireworks started at 10. This is my first time seeing the fireworks here in Seattle, and my first time seeing fireworks in 'the big city.' When I was growing up in Arizona, they were put on by the Lions Club in the football field of my old high school. I remember we would all squash together onto one of my dad's old army blankets. They had 'donated' a dollar for each of us to get in. We brought snacks, because god forbid we were ever allowed to buy the 'overpriced garbage' they served in the little food area. Oh the things you want so much when you're a child. I always wanted the crap food from the food trailers. As an adult, not so much. The fireworks growing up were cute... and we would have these little displays at field level (like the American flag in red, white & blue sparklers) and then some up in the sky. There were always a lot of firetrucks on hand because Arizona in July is dry as a bone and if any of the ash from the fireworks came down on the grassy fields next to the football field, it would burn fast. There were always some teeny tiny fires out in the fields that had to be put out quickly. The 'big city' fireworks were different than the fireworks of my childhood. Bigger. Able to do more things... smiley faces? Giant displays of color. Curtains of light. It was only 30 minutes but it seemed to go on much longer. I really enjoyed it. Afterward, we just sat and let the throngs of people leave around us. We separated from the others and V & I caught the bus home. We stopped in R Place but there was noone really to see. In Alaska, we didn't have fireworks on the 4th of July. There's no point. It isn't dark. Fireworks are on New Years Eve. Of course then it is so damn cold you don't want to be sitting out on the snow watching them. And of course we had the Aurora Borealis, which is oh so much cooler than fireworks ever could be. 3 AM stumbling down the hill from upper campus, drunk... the Aurora was magical those times. I think I went to the fireworks once when I lived in CA. I went to Channel Islands Harbor one July 4th with a coworker and her mom and we went out on a boat and watched them. It was very cool. Last year I was working at the casino and my car was in the shop so I was doing the 2 hr bus ride. I didn't get home until after 8:00 and by then I was just tired and didn't want to deal. I think I tried to see them out the window of my apartment but the stupid buildings around me are in the way. :) Next year... who knows...

Saturday, July 03, 2004

Alarm Clocks

There is a special place in hell for those people who go away for the night and leave their alarm clock on so that in the morning it just keeps going off for hours. There's also a special place in that hell for alarm clock manufacturers who don't build a default off after an hour or so.

Friday, July 02, 2004

Fellow Gym Showerers

I can't believe I forgot about these women. There actually are people showering at 7:00 when Jess & I shower. This group of (to my mind at least) scary swiming/bicycling/Ironman (Ironwoman?) freaks are in there every morning comparing their swimming notes and what races/contests they are planning on doing. They are fairly intense about it and I almost fear them. These are also the dreaded locker room naked women. IE they just wander around the whole locker room completely naked not really trying to cover anything. You can tell I grew up in a repressed Catholic non-naked house. We did not walk around naked. Ever. We did not see each other naked... we did not discuss naked... (hell we never discussed sex until I was an adult and my little sister was knocked up and my mother was explaining to me how I was incorrect in my assertion that she could've made him wear a condom. She said that men don't like them and I just don't understand... I, being 21 years old at the time did not correct her incorrect view. When I was about 16ish she wanted me ME to tell my sister the facts of life. When I refused, she bought Amanda a book. A book! Good luck to you Timmy on explaining to Curly Top where babies come from). So I am totally uncomfortable around naked people... really, in the gym.. how hard is it to put a towel around you? or you know put the panties and bra on at least.

Timmy missed me!

Awww. that's so exciting! So either his life is not better than mine, or his job is as boring if not more boring than mine. :)

All sorts of not particularly exciting things have been happening this week.

Wednesday (I think it was) I fell asleep on my sofa at 7:30... woke up at 8:30... went into the bedroom to put on jammies... lay on the bed fell back asleep until 9:00 tried to get up and come watch TV and finally gave in at 9:30 and went to bed for real. Woke up at 5:00 the next morning feeling rather crappy from too much sleep.

The reason I haven't been logging in and blogging lately though is that my left eye has been bothering me a great deal. Apparently I have a sub somethingorother irritation. My left eye is all very pink/red and actually rather painful. It feels like there is a huge amount of pressure behind the eye as well. It started last Thursday and wasn't terrible, but kept getting worse and worse. I finally went to the eye doctor yesterday. It has been over 2 years since I've been to the eye doctor and I had almost forgotten how much I hate that whole experience of "Which one's better 1 or 2... 2 or 3... 3 or 4..." You feel like maybe if you answer wrong it will be a really bad thing. He also spent a lot of time looking at my left eye and that's what he came up with... A sub somethingorother irritation. Basically between the 1st & 2nd layers of the eye. He gave me some drops and sent me about my merry way. Since it has been over 2 years and my glasses needs have changed I decided to get a new pair. This is DIFFICULT. The glasses I like are more than the $115 my insurance allows and honestly anything more than that is more than I went to spend. After 45 minutes of the little helper guy suggesting things and me rejecting them (really purple? what am I 9?? Tortise shell cat's eye, am I my mother circa 1968??). I finally settled on a pair that I don't think look hideous. (Funny side note... little helper guy had a tongue piercing that I think was new because he was having difficulty talking). So Thursday night I start putting the new drops in. Two drops every 4 hours. Thursday evening I was in so much pain I was lying on the sofa with a warm rag over my left eye. Didn't help and ended up having to take pain medication. No improvement today so I called the Dr and now have newer stronger drops. Lucky me.

I was dealt with some sad news Wednesday evening. My Fred Meyers is closing down. I love Fred Meyers. Once this shop closes down I'm going to have to leave the downtown/ Capital hill area to shop for the basic beauty necessities: shampoo, conditioner, soap etc. Grocery stores and drug stores are all rather expensive for these supplies. At least QFC (owned by the same parent co as Fred Meyers) is keeping the same rock & twig section so I'll still be able to get my GF food without too much trouble.

My coworker and I have changed up our gym schedule. I'm now leaving for the gym at like 5:50 AM to get there at about 6:15. (I walk and have stop lights and all that). We then shower at the gym. This is traumatizing to me. I am not a big fan of being naked in public. Even if that public is only the women's locker room at my university. (I throw this in just for Timmy)... It is so daunting to shower around all the perfect little college girl coeds who are all of 18ish and skinny. (honestly, though, at 7:00 in the morning they aren't there thank goodness because then I would really be neurotic about showering at the gym). But this shower switch now gives us about 45 minutes of a workout. I actually did 3 sets of ten leg lifts on the roman chair... 2 of those sets being legs straight out kind and not knee curl up kind.

Whee it is 8:00 and time for my next round of new eye drops...