Friday, December 31, 2004

He said what?!

So V & I went out tonight and were joined by his tranny friends and this other random guy. I've met the trannys before but this other guy is one they had just met. So we're up on the 3rd floor playing darts. He has already sidled up to the 2 trannys and had some sort of discussion that I couldn't really hear. So he comes around to where I'm at the table and says to me "There's just something about a man in drag that I find so hot you know. I'm not hitting on you or anything, but..." And at that point I cut him of and say "Uh, sweetie, you realize I'm a woman right?" He says, "Yeah, I knew that." Then he wanders off and I don't get to talk to him the rest of the evening. I laughed my ass off after he wandered away. He was kind of weird and even after the trannys left he kept talking to V, the whole time I'm thinking 'Please V, stop talking to him and shoo him off.' Finally the guy left.

Thursday, December 30, 2004

New Year's Rockin' Eve

What to do what to do for New Year's Eve? The question is on the table again. My 1st option is to just drink the 2 bottles of rum that followed me home from the liquor store and watch a video and eat raspberry sorbet. My 2nd option is to go to RPlace with V and drink heavily. My 3rd option is Michelle's suggestion - Drink before I go to the bar so I don't spend too much money there, kiss lesbians and then come home and eat raspberry sorbet. My gayboypotheadbartending fiance** will be there I'm sure. I will probably do #3, although probably not with kissing lesbians, but depending on how drunk I get that may happen too.

**And just to clarify because I've talked about him a lot lately, Once upon a time, like a year ago, Jeffy started calling me his wife and I played along. Recently he asked me when we were finally going to get married and I said whenever he sets a date so he did. April 20th (which is how I discovered he's a pothead too.) Are we really going to get married on 4/20? Eh, probably not. Is he really gay, sadly yes. Is he really a pothead, yes obviously since he's always wanted to get married on 4/20. Is he really hot, oh yeah.

You got questions - we got answers

A) One Hour Photo (for a rare sighting of Michael Vartan's pubes) Seen it, scared the piss out of me; Homecoming Queen by Winifred Madison I will consult Seattle Public Library on this one; Ven Conmigo by Christina Aguilera I'll have to look into that too.

B) Who was someone in college who I knew who you had a crush on who I would be totally shocked to find out about? I did have a total crush on Helen's Rob but I think you knew that. I can't think of anyone you knew that I had a crush on that I wouldn't have told you... BUT I will tell you that there was this guy I used to make out with in the library closed book storage while we were supposed to be working. Who I later found out from Al that he just really liked kissing. We never went any further, just would make out once in a while in this closet. That's a funny memory.

What is the one thing you absolutely wish you could say to your mom? I've been thinking about this question for days. I think I have always wanted to point out that many of the things that she has bitched about about her own upbringing and her relationship with her mother are the same things she's done to me. She always used to complain about how she was a second class citizen in her own home and her mother loved her brother and sister more... and it was the same for me - She didn't even hide the fact that she loved both my sisters more, and she rarely makes the effort to really understand who I am. Which brings me to the fact that the bottom line reason I don't want to have kids is that I'm terrified that all those people who say "Just wait until you have kids and you'll find yourself saying those things too" might actually be right and that no matter how hard I try, I'll end up sounding like her. No 11 year old kid should be told "You'll be just like your sister and have abortions" when you don't even know what one is. (Ok that might be an overshare)

What is one thing you would do differently in your past if you could? I totally should've jumped on Aaron when I had the chance! :) (Aaron would be the boy of the hat story) Damn if I had a brain cell in my pretty little head and realized that there may have been some mutual interest...


I just got back from my hockey game. I really enjoyed it. The T-Birds won by 2 points. Towards the very end of the game, the Everett team pulled their goalie (T-birds were only up by 1 at that point) which allows them to have an extra man on the ice. T-Birds get the puck and manage to score on a no goalie situation. The last 45 seconds two fights broke out. It was kind of strange because the refs didn't stop it. They didn't do anything initially until like they were pulling each other down to the ground. However... I AM CURSED! Apparently when I choose my own hockey seats (as opposed to when my friend Sommar picks them when we go together) I get stuck sitting near pucks. I'll let you think about that for a minute to figure out what I mean by a puck... I had 2 of them next to me. Apparently at least one of the 2 has dated players on both teams as she felt the need to cheer for whoever had the puck at the time. They spoke in those high annoying valley girl way and reminded me of little bird girls. By the end of the game I wanted to kill either them or myself but I couldn't decide which. There was much discussion about how "I told zack he better not hit my curtis and now I'm pissed" and "Oh don't give him a bigger fat lip, I need to be able to kiss those lips." I was so tempted to put my headphones on so I didn't have to hear this crap anymore, but I didn't want to miss the announcements. In college Kate, Shelley and I always managed to find ourselves near an entire row of pucks. We learned far more about the sexual behaviors of our hockey players than any sane and normal person ever wanted to know.

On the way home from the Seattle Center, I walked to the bus stop. Here's one of the times Joanne isn't so smart. I could've picked up a bus on Broad in front of the EMP (I think it is Broad it might not be) which is a very busy street. If I had caught one of those buses I would've had to switch in front of Benaroya hall to the 2, so I decided catch the 2 directly. The 2's stop is on a road that would be busy, if it was during the day but it wasn't. So I'm standing there just hanging out waiting for the bus and for some reason I started crying. I blame it 100% on menstrual syndrome, but I was just standing there thinking about the single life and how tired I'm of being single. Michelle once told me (with regards to self-confidence but it applies here) that if you fake it long enough you start to believe it. So mostly I believe it that I don't mind being single and my life is great but standing there waiting for the bus, I stopped believing. And it made me sad. And I started wondering why I think I believe in fate or balance in the universe because obviously there is no justice out there. Then I stood there and realized how sad it is that I'm crying waiting for the bus and that made more tears fall. Luckily the bus came and I wiped my tears and came home. Sigh. I can't wait for the week to be over. (And then I read Michelle's comment about Greg and it made me giggle)

Wednesday, December 29, 2004

Stuffing big things into little things

Today I finally took down my Christmas tree so that I could have my craft table back. I have no idea how the original company managed to stuff that tree into the teeny tiny box. I can't ever get it back into the box without having a weird bulge in the middle. It is like when we were at Girl Scout Camp. These campers would come in with these sleeping bags that had to get stuffed back into these little bags. It would be Saturday morning, and parents would be pulling up and we'd have this little girl in hysterics " f..fa...fath...father w..will be soooo so so mad if I can't get it baaaack innnn!!!" So Joanne and Michelle and all the other counselors would spend their morning trying to shove something very big into a fairly small hole. (Luckily I have had some experience with that... ;) ) (And I've just scandalized my little sister hee) After about the 1st week of camp we would be so used to the process that we could get them all done before breakfast. Random side note - if you have daughters (Timmy! and Katie) and you send them to summer camp and they come home with their hair braided - they haven't showered since at least the day before you picked them up and quite possibly since long before that. That was our trick, it was already difficult to get the girls to shower and they'd wash their hair but who knows if they did a good job or not so on Saturday morning all the little girls would get their hair braided by counselor Joanne or counselor Janel or anyone else to hide the fact that their hair was kind of icky and messy. I have had camp on my mind a lot lately. I was sitting here on the sofa yesterday and a random camp song came into my head. I think I just want to go to camp and not have to work a real job. :)


Apparently the only people who are home during the day have diabetes. This I have been able to learn from my 3 vacation days thus far (Next year, I don't know what I'm doing but I am SOOOO not spending them here in this apartment not cleaning and not working on any useful projects except playing Legend of Zelda Oracle of Seasons). I know I shouldn't complain because I am lucky I have these days off. Most people I know don't. But back to diabetes, I was able to discern that the entire stay-at-home population has it by incredibly scientific method. That's all the commercials they show during daytime television. Wilford Brimley (Didn't he die??) and his diabetes test strips. The new medicare prescription cards that will pay for your diabetes supplies. A variety of drugs that will help you with your diabetes. New testing apparatus that are out. AND My personal favorite - Mary Tyler Moore talking about Juvenile Diabetes with these annoying kids talking about who their hero is. Of course, with my tendency to snack all day long because I'm bored, I could be well on my way to adult fat chick diabetes so... (Ok just kidding Katie, don't get all worried). BAH! Again with the Wilford Brimley. I can't cope. Tomorrow I am going on a field trip. I don't know where, I don't even care where but I can't be in this apartment all day without wanting to kill someone. (uh oh, I'm the only one here.... :D)

Tuesday, December 28, 2004

Excessive shopping & traumatic TV

So one of my biggest problems when I was unemployed was that I would get bored and go wander downtown and spend money I didn't have. Now I'm gainfully employed, on vacation and bored and wandering downtown spending money I kindof have but shouldn't spend. :) Although today I only spent $27.00 so that's not too horrible. At my almost new favorite store Bed Bath & Beyond I found another extremely cool thing... Ok actually I already bought it like 2 weeks ago but I bought the wrong size and they let me exchange it even though I had lost the receipt. Anyway they have these shower curtain rods that are tension based so you can put it in a doorway or I guess the wall between the bathroom, but they are fabulous for me because I didn't want to put screws in the wall to hang up the curtain I have for between my living room & kitchen (doorway but nothing there) and the one I have for the closet (for some reason I have no closet doors). Anyway look how easily I get sidetracked... I also bought Wil Wheaton's new book Just A Geek. Yay. I have a small schoolgirl crush on Wil Wheaton. I loved him in Stand By Me. I only watched Star Trek Next Generation when he would be on. After he left the show, I stopped watching. Once I started reading his blog, I started having a great respect for him. Any guy who loves his wife and step-kids the way he apparently does is a good guy. I'm excited to start the book... :)

With nothing else on this evening, I decided to watch Mystic River. Somethingorother Award winning for Tim Robbins and Sean Penn. All I can say is I want that 45 minutes back. It was painfully slow and required way more focus than I wanted to give it. So then I switched to The Amazing Race for the last 15 minutes of the show. Michelle & I have been talking about this show recently because she knows one of the women on the show this round. I figured I would check it out since Veronica Mars is in reruns. It was painful (not painful sad, but painful like a tooth being drilled without novacaine). I think maybe it was because I don't watch the show regularly AND it was a highlights clip show but I didn't like any of the people shown and thought they were so awful I wouldn't want to see any of them win. Of course much of reality tv is like that.

Monday, December 27, 2004

Noah's Ark Dream

Ok not exactly a Noah's Ark dream, but there were several animals in last night's dream. It is entirely possible it is related to the watching of the Lion King yesterday but here goes...

I was with this guy and we were shopping. We were looking at these little stone carvings of animals. He was looking for a bear and found it but I (I think it was me) dropped it. So we were crawling on the ground and there were all these other little stone carvings of animals on the ground too and we couldn't find his bear. I found an alligator, a bird, a turtle, I think a dolphin or whale, a dragon fly and I want to say a Lion (but I could be thinking that based on the aformentioned Lion King sighting).

According to Dreammoods...

Stone: To see stones in your dream, symbolizes strength, unity, and unyielding beliefs. Consider the common phrase "etched in stone" which suggest permanence and unchanging attitudes. Some stones also carry sacred and magical meanings. Alternatively, stones may relate to issues of moral judgment and/or guilt.

I couldn't find a description for charm or little carved thing. So we'll go with the animals

Bear: Alternatively, bears symbolize the cycle of life and death and renewal. It may signal of period of introspection and thinking. The dream may also be a pun on "bare". Perhaps you need to bare your soul and let everything out into the open.

Alligator: To see an alligator in your dream, symbolizes treachery, deceit, and hidden instincts. It may be a signal for you to take a new perspective on a situation. It may also represent your ability to move between the material world of waking life and the emotional, repressed world of the unconscious. Alternatively, the alligator represents healing powers and qualities.

Bird: To dream of a chirping and/or flying birds, represents joy, harmony, ecstasy, balance, and love. It denotes a sunny outlook in life. You will experience spiritual freedom and psychological liberation. It is almost as if a weight has been lifted off your shoulders.

Dolphin: To see a dolphin in your dream, symbolizes spiritual guidance, your intellect, mental attributes and emotional trust. Utilize your mind to its capacity and you will move upward in life. Alternatively, it suggests that a line of communication has been established between the conscious and unconscious aspects of yourself. Dolphins represent your willingness and ability to explore and navigate through your emotions.

Lion: To see a lion in your dream, symbolizes great strength, aggression and power. You will overcome your emotions and/or difficulties. As king of the jungle, the lion also represents royalty, leadership, pride and dominion. You have much influence over others. You may also need to exercise restraint in your own personal and social life.

Turtle: To see turtles in your dream, suggests that you will make slow but steady progress. You need to slow down and pace yourself. Alternatively, it indicates that you are sheltering yourself from the realities of life.

Whale: To see a whale in your dream, represents your intuition and awareness. You are in tuned to your sense of spirituality. Alternatively, it indicates a relationship or business project that is too enormous to handle.

Dragonfly: To see a dragonfly in your dream, symbolizes changes. It may also indicate that something in our life may not not appear as it seems.

Anyone care to take a stab at what this all means?

It's Michelle's Fault

Since I responded on Michelle's Blog I have to post this here (I don't HAVE to, it isn't like she's twisting my arm or anything).

(A) First, recommend to me:1. a movie2. a book3. a musical artist, song, or album
(B) Ask me three questions, no more, no less. Ask me anything you want. Answers will be posted in a couple days--great time for strangers to say hi.
(C) Then go back to your blog and copy and paste this, allowing your friends to ask you anything; say that you stole it from me.

Christmas Week Goals

Well, since I have a week off for Christmas I feel compelled to make a hypothetical list of things I would like to accomplish during this week. I would like to think I'm not going to spend a week sitting on my ass watching TV and IMing my friends all day long. (Although in all honesty that's what I'll probably end up doing). So here's my list.
  • Clean (HAHAHA)
  • Begin my quilt project
  • Take down Christmas tree and stow Christmas boxes
  • Hang new shower curtain (ooh I need to go to bed bath & beyond to get new hooks)

Day is done...

Gone the sun... From the lakes from the hills from the sky!

Ahhh days of camp memories. I wasn't planning on telling this story tonight but, for some reason it came into my head, so first a little tale (hee I almost spelled it tail which is funny considering the story) then I will regale you with my adventures of today. In my apartment, hanging on the old intercom box (no longer use intercoms here) is a kind of gross looking tie-dyed bucket hat. I love this hat because it represents one of my great unrequited loves. (That's not saying much, almost all my great 'loves' of the past have been unrequited... for some reason I and the boy never have enough balls to say what needs to be said.) Anyway, at camp for 2 years I worked with this fellow whose company I genuinely enjoyed. We had good conversations. He was, for the most part, a good person. I was smitten. :) So the 2nd year of camp, I had this hat that I would wear every day, a white bucket hat. One day, while on the lake canoeing, said hat flew off my head and landed on the water. It floated for a minute, than was run over by another canoe and sunk to the bottom. This was not a normal lake, this was a former gravel quarry. Anyone who knows about gravel quarries will know that they are bizarrely deep in some areas, so we couldn't even see it on the bottom. One day towards the end of camp, boy comes up to me bearing something in his hands. My hat. The hat I loved. He managed to fish it out of the lake. I don't know how, or how long it really took but he had it. It stunk so bad that the smell was actually indescribable. It was fishy green and brown from a month at the bottom of the lake. But I had my hat back. And after multiple washings with bleach, simple green and more bleach, it didn't stink too badly. That may be, in all honesty, the sweetest thing a guy has ever done for me. I have to point out, this is also the same guy who, when I was in a fit of rage (which is fairly rare for me) at the camp boss of the time, he walked 2 and a half miles with me to a campsite down the road and then 2 and a half miles back while I raged and fumed and eventually calmed down.

Anyway, thanks for indulging my little trip down memory lane, on with today's adventures. Got up and went to the fat chick store, which was having a sale. I was sorely disappointed with much of my choices but did end up with 4 bras (the real reason I went) a white shirt and sweater. But the trip was saved by a trip to GI Joes sports and automotive (who thought of this combination I wonder?). One thing I failed to point out about my bad Thursday was that I discovered that my absolute favorite forest green Converse Chucks have been worn through the sole. Sigh. I love these shoes. I have been wearing a pair of forest green Chucks since college. They have gotten harder to find. ANYWAY, at GI Joes Sports and Automotive I found a pair of chucks I couldn't live without. Not forest green this time, but a soft dove gray with pink accents. I lurve them. More than I should probably. I also got a new pair of workout shoes. It was a good shopping day. This evening I spent watching The Lion King (for a 2nd time in 4 days) while volunteering at the Paramount theater. It was relatively uneventful. I always wonder what people think when getting dressed up for the theater. The clothing seems to run the full gamut from almost ball gowns to sweat pants. When I was growing up, on the very rare occasions we went to the theater, it was a dress up occasion. To show respect for the show and the theater and all that, plus it was a huge treat and a huge deal. I like to see the little kids with their parents dressed in their Sunday or Christmas dresses or in their little button down shirts and sweaters with slacks. It is just the way it should be to me. Now I'm relaxing, and watching A Knight's Tale. This is another one of those things I shouldn't love but I do. I think (oh please I know) it is a Heath Ledger thing. Mmm... Heath Ledger. And for my final thought, since Sorbet is really just pureed fruit with some sweetener and then frozen, wouldn't it always be fat free? My raspberry sorbet is proudly proclaiming this. I don't get it, but it is damn yummy.

Saturday, December 25, 2004


Those people who design that indestructible plastic used to surround items such as little tiny computer parts or my new pedometer should be forced, when they die, to spend their eternity trying to escape after being sealed in one of those plastic bubbles. They are impossible! I cut a portion of one of the manuals trying to cut out this little memory stick thingie.

In other thoughts, now that Christmas is SOOO over, I just did an estimation of my taxes for next year. I should be getting a tidy little refund. I may have to use it to replace Jakob... (computer over 5 years old) With the computer discounts we get at work, this might just be doable. I think I'll have to go for another laptop, though. There is just no space in my apartment for a desktop and all the equipment that goes with one.

One other thought...

The new shower curtain I am oh so excited about courtesy of Archie McPhee and my little sister, has no shower curtain weights on the bottom. Maybe because it is vinyl and not whatever that other shower curtain material is, it doesn't need weights. But if it does the billow in on me thing like my other one does I might be a tiny bit disappointed.


There's little so acutely disappointing as having an idea of something you desperately want to eat and not having all the necessary ingredients. I just posted that I was looking forward to banana nut muffins for breakfast... little did I know that the mix I had in the fridge that I thought was muffin mix... it is angel food cake mix. Why in the hell do I have that? I probably could go to QFC and get some mix, but I really shouldn't patronize a store that forces its employees to work on Chrsitmas instead of being at home with their families. Eh who am I kidding, I'll probably totally go and get mix. :)

Merry Christmas To All!

And to all a good night. Michelle will laugh at this, but I initially misspelled Merry Christmas in my title. Hee.

This year my family finally came through with the Devil Duck shower curtain I've wanted since last Christmas. My mom even bought the matching bathmat and trash can so now I have to clean the bathroom to make it worthy of all this finery. But I got a fairly decent haul, and much of what I wanted so life is good. I went last night to buy a roast to have for Christmas day dinner... not so much since they didn't have any of the type I wanted. They did have some fancy schmancy roasts that made my head explode when I looked at the price. Over $50.00 for a little roast? I will not be eating that. I will be eating a Christmas Steak for dinner tonight. :) Mmm. but I'm hungry now I think I'll make some banana nut muffins for breakfast.

Happy holidays dear readers I hope all your dreams for the new year come true.

Thursday, December 23, 2004

Hakuna Matata!

I will be seeing The Lion King at the Paramount 3 times in the next week and a half. Not so much because I love it beyond anything else, but today I got an email from the volunteer coordinator desperate for ushers for several shows over the next week. I will be attending as a volunteer tonight, Sunday night and as a paying customer (bought the ticket a month or more ago) on Jan 2nd. It may be more than I can handle seeing it THAT much.

What a day!

And thankgoodness it is over, mostly. Today was our department potluck for the holiday. We did one of those gift exchanges where you bring in something 'white elephant' and then we open it and you can steal someone elses. I am not that fond of doing these gift exchanges. Really, I am not fond of gift exchanges at work at all. I would much prefer it if we would all just take a name off the toys for tots tree and do that instead. Anyway, today's heavily traded items were a book of George Bush paper dolls (Punch out George Bush and his pals), a purse from China and a blue glass ball. At one point I had each of these items, but people kept trading me out. I ended up with a soap/lotion gift set. This would be okay except that it is rose scented. I HATE rose scented things.

Last night I very carefully made pizza. Many in the department were wanting to taste my pizza. I carried it to work. I managed to stow it in the refridgerator at work (if you aren't sure where I'm going here, you probably rode the short bus to school). I take it out at lunchtime and head over to the Student Center Pavillion where there is an oven to heat it up (I had cooked it last night. It was so beautiful, the cheese brown and crispy the way pizza cheese should be). I set it on the counter and removed the foil and stepped away when whammo! Somehow I had not set the pan down correctly on the counter and the pan flipped completely upside down on the floor. The 3 second rule did cross my mind, very seriously crossed my mind until I looked at the floor. Not especially clean and it had that grit built into the floor to be non-stick. Plus there was a witness. :) So no pizza. I was a tiny bit heartbroken.

My boss, (Whose job I will soon have thanks to the power of positive thinking) annoyed me much of today trying to make sure everything was done. Surprisingly enough it was. :) We got to go home early. Now I had my backpack on, a bag in my hand, a coat on and am walking downstairs on my way out the doors when... I get handed a form. Sigh. Instead of going back up to my office, I just tossed it in my mailbox in the HR office. I then saw a person I had been waiting for a form from so I made her fill it out and tossed that in my mailbox too. In final thoughts, I think I lost my bus pass for the month. V usually uses it, so it doesn't affect me TOO much, but that means no bus pass for him... unless I've already given it to him. AND I had this whole idea that I had a car rental voucher that would give me a $100.00 off a car rental so I would rent a car for the week that I'm off and get to do little day trips to like Tacoma where there is a zoo and aquarium that's supposed to be awesome. I looked at the voucher finally. It expired on the 8th of December.

I am SOOO looking forward to this next week off. I really need it after today! :)

Tuesday, December 21, 2004

10 Things I have an unholy love for

1 - Tacos! Like tacos wouldn't be on this list? Tacos to me are like sandwiches to a regular bread eating person.
2 - So I married an Axe Murder I love Mike Meyers and his poetry in this movie. I've watched it far too many times this week since it is on one of the fancy ass cable channels I have.
3 - Fancy ass cable channels Currently I get Starz and HBO. I used to get Showtime, but now that they have cancelled Dead Like Me, there is absolutely no reason to get Showtime. How many times can I want to watch the crappyass 80's movie For Keeps?
4 - Real World/Road Rules Challenge I know I shouldn't love it, but it's like crack. I watched it a teeny tiny bit and suddenly I needed more and more.
5 - Cheese Mmmm... cheese. Do I need to say more on this one?
6 - Eminem As a woman and a friend to the gays, I shouldn't love him. But I do. Does it make it right since I download his music instead of spending my own hard earned cash?
7 - Anything Disney My religion can do no wrong for me. Like any good fanatic, I worship at the alter of the mouse. It is getting to be time for me to make another trip to my holyland. When I get my boss's job, I will have the money to be able to do that.
8 - Movies with Drew Barrymore Even the not so good ones like Home Fries. If it's got Drew in it, I'm tuned in. Maybe because I think it is so awesome that she had such a crappy childhood and yet has turned her life around. (I had a similar love for Danny Bonaduce for the same reason, until I heard he cheated on his wife. Then I became sad for Gretchen because she put up with a lot of shit from him, more than anyone should. AND she continues to put up with shit from him because unlike Michelle and I would do, she took him back after he cheated.)
9 - Games on MSN They give me something to do when I'm sitting in my office eating my lunch day after day. I should get out and socialize more (especially if I'm to be a successful stalker of workcrush), but...
10 - Jammies Every day I get off work at 4:30. I'm almost always home by 5 (except on Brownie Wednesdays). I'm usually in jammies by like 5:15 at the latest. I don't like to wear work clothes at home because I'm a sloppy eater and because, well, they aren't comfy like jammies. It does get embarrassing when the UPS driver comes at like 5:30 and I'm already in jammies, but I suspect he's just glad I'm wearing clothes at all (or was that a bad sporno I saw on HBO?)
11 - (The secret and totally guilty one) 7th Heaven It is like watching a car accident. You just can't believe it could get any worse, and it DOES! Then you think, ok they can't be more preachy and stupid and the next week they are. It is horrifying, yet oddly addictive.

He's been redeemed

By the the blood of the lamb... or actually because he signed for my stupid UPS package. The he who has been redeemed would be my landlord who I have previously bitched about mostly thanks to Cujo. Cujo is actually not a bad dog at all. I pet her today and she is kind of cute and he laughed that I called her Cujo. We had a nice little chat about packages and Cujo (now that I think about it he didn't tell me her real name) and stuff like that. I continue to have a hatred for UPS since they won't just leave packages. If it is a little package, I'm okay with it because I can have it delivered to work and just carry it home. If it is a big package, not so easy.


Phew. I applied for my boss's job today. I want it. I hope I get it. I'll be crushed if I don't. It was difficult I guess is the word, since the online application process requires things that make me go huh. Like references. I listed the old ones I used to use to get this job. Because really, I already have a job with SU. They know about me. Why do I have to do this?! If it is any consolation to me, everybody I've spoken with has asked if I'm going to apply and/or assured me I would get it. Here's hoping. My contact at one of our retirement plans said he'd put in a good word for me if I wanted him to, and there was a faculty member in my office recently who did 2 things. 1 - offered me a part time job helping her with her financial stuff. I can barely control my own financial stuff. 2 - went next door and told my current boss how awesome I am. If my current boss hadn't been there (and within earshot of her saying 'who is your boss? I want to tell her what an asset you are') I totally would've sent her down to big boss.
Fingers crossed? Check
Toes crossed? Check
Offering to gods? Check
Knocked on wood? Check
Wished on a star and in a fountain? Check
Found a lucky penny? Check
I think I've covered all the bases. :D

It's a wedding!

Now who could I possibly be marrying, I am sure you are all wondering. Since just what, 4 posts or so ago I was lamenting my single status. My gay, pothead, bartending fiance has set a date for the wedding. April 20th. Probably around 4:35 PM. This will give him a chance to get prepared. I will be the one in the green dress. Location to be determined. We've both agreed that this will be an 'open' marriage to ensure that either one of us gets laid sometimes. We also won't be comingling finances because, well, I'm not supporting a pothead's habit. At least I think this is what we agreed to last night. The details are kind of fuzzy thanks to said bartender's ability to pour most of a tumbler full of rum with a shot of orange juice on top to make it seem like a real mixed drink. I could be entirely mistaken about the wedding plans. :)

Joanne's Googlism

joanne is a hot teen sex slut Well, yes that's obvious.
joanne is going where god is calling I just go where he tells me... to be a hot teen sex slut.
joanne is committed to providing you outstanding personalized service through her genuine caring for her client's needs I'm just good at my job.
joanne is it our fault you have a problem? Yes, yes it is.
joanne is already making use of her artificial leg
joanne is a crossdresser married to lisa Lisa knows all about me and accepts me for who I am, a hot teen sex slut.
joanne is now president of boise's chapter of sisters in crime
joanne is an e
joanne is constantly reminded
joanne is the perfect Was there any question?
joanne is married to actor paul newman and they have three daughters
joanne is a romantic
joanne is a dreamer
joanne is honeybear
joanne is a sculptor do the sculptures count if they are in mashed potatoes?
joanne is here
joanne is the total package You get what you pay for.

Monday, December 20, 2004


I hate to do chores, as is obvious by my constant discussion of how much I hate to do dishes. I realized part of the reason why is because we don't seem to have cooler water from the taps. I am always scalding my hands. I move the little water spigot handle thing closer to me to be colder, no dice. It is always too hot. The other chore I hate to do is the recycling. I think it is because doing the recycling always involves an active role. In taking out the trash, I just take the bag, tie it up and run it downstairs. The recycling always involves more. I have to flatten whatever boxes. I have to wash out cans and jars (ok this actually gets done as I use the can or jar or else that can or jar just gets chucked, they're too hard to wash out later on). Coke cans I think I'm supposed to crush, but I don't. I'm sure one of these days there'll be a nasty note from the trash nazi lady. Soda bottles have to be washed out. It is a lot of extra work! Last night I took out the recycling for the first time in a LONG time. I had 3 plastic bags of plastic bags and like 4 paper bags of crushed cardboard. I felt like one of those dads trying to hook it all on my fingers so I only had to make one trip. Then there was someone in the elevator. I felt compelled to explain why I had 52 bags of paper and plastic. So now I have 52 bags of trash and I'm explaining it to this kid who lives upstairs as if he cares, and as if I care what he thinks. It was kinda ridiculous.

rough night

Last night. I woke up at 2:30. And that was it, I was just awake. I tried all the tricks, counting backwards from 1,000. At about 650 I gave up because I was still wide awake. I turned on the light and played my gameboy hoping that would help. No such luck. Read my Tarot cards. If they're right, I may be screwed the next few months. :) Turned the light back off and did that relax each part of your body until you fall asleep thing. That finally worked at 4:00. I so did not get up to the gym this morning at 5. :)

I did have a weird dream, though. I dreamt that Michelle was visiting. And we found an abandoned big dog. She decided to take it home with her, but at the last minute she decided not to since she has 2 big dogs already. So she left it with me. I had angst over keeping it becuase I live in a small apartment, but in the end I kept it and we were walking and it was on a leash.

According to

Dog:To see a dog in your dream, indicate a skill that you have ignored or forgotten, but needs to be activated. Alternatively, dogs may symbolize intuition, loyalty, generosity, protection, and fidelity. Your own values and intentions will enable you to go forward in the world and succeed.

Airport: (since we were at the airport getting ready to leave when Michelle changed her mind) To see a busy airport in your dream, signifies the desire for freedom, high ideals, ambition, and hopes. It is an indication that you are approaching a new departure in your life. Some new idea is taking off or is ready to take off. You may be experiencing a new relationship, new career path or new adventure.

Leash: To dream that you are holding a leash, indicates a need for more control in your life.

Hmm... What this means... what this means.

Saturday, December 18, 2004

Health, health, health darling!

Today I had a rather unusual craving for salad. Why is this unusual, mostly because I don't eat green stuff if I can avoid it. :) But today, I thought a nice crisp cucumber and some lettuce would be yummy. Now before you all go thinking I'm healthy and crap, you should know what was in this salad...
Lettuce - Iceberg. I'm not a big fan of the rock & twig lettuce. I ate a salad once at the Captain Cook in Anchorage and it totally seemed like I was eating dandelions. It was not yummy.
Cucumbers - Yum. I've always loved cucumbers.
Carrots - Again yum. I've always liked carrots (raw never cooked).
So that's all relatively good right? Here's where the salad started going downhill...
Chicken. Ok, chicken isn't really bad for you. Protein and all that.
Shredded Cheddar - Yum cheese! Really, it's all about the cheese.
Ranch - Based on the amount still in the bottom of the bowl, I used way too much ranch. :) But it is so yummy. And it was Lite Done Right, that counts right? :) Right??

I made this salad while I was STARVING so it was huge (the middle size of one of those 3 glass mixing bowl sets). Now I'm completely full, except maybe for a little space for a fudgsicle. Those are healthy, right?? RIGHT?

Thursday, December 16, 2004

Hockey Yay!

I bought a ticket to go to a Seattle Thunderbirds game on the 29th vs. the Everett Silvertips. Since Everett is just a little north of here, this is a big rivalry and there will be a lot of Everett fans at the game. This may be the only time I leave the apartment the entire week I have off. Last night, I was trying to order a ticket at ticketmaster. I hate them. For my $20.00 ticket, they wanted to tax me 2 bucks and then their 4 dollar convenience charge. Plus I was hoping to get an aisle seat. So today I called the Thunderbird ticket office directly. Booya! Although I didn't get my aisle seat, I got a seat in row number 2. ROW 2! I am ever so excited about this. But now that I look at this ticket, I have a sinking feeling I may have picked a weird place to sit. I chose it because it is behind the penalty boxes and I remember in college that these were fun seats (although in college we were actually behind the players' benches). I also like to be in the middle because I can see the action better. The other 2 times I went with a coworker, we sat behind a goal and you can only see well that goal and not the other. It has since dawned on me, though, I may have just picked a seat in the 'Everett section.' Eh, life goes on... or those Everett rednecks will kill me. :) At which time Michelle or Volodiya will have to do the apartment sweep before my parents' come to officially clean it out. There are definitely some skeletons in my apartment I don't think my poor Catholic mother should see. :D

Christmas Presents

Whee! Some have arrived from Michelley and my parents. I opened Michelley's already. Very nice, the 2004 Starlounge CD and a penguin (I collect penguins) charm. Of the random crap my parents sent, (and sadly I'm not even talking about the Christmas presents except for 1 yet) a coat rack to hang on the wall. I've actually battled with my mother over this one multiple times. The battle being... DON'T SEND IT! Obviously I lost. A cordless rechargable screwdriver. That's okay and actually kind of useful. And some quilting tools, also kind of useful. I have opened one present already, because it was bottle shaped. I was apparently wrongly hoping for it to be alcohol. Not quite. Maraschino cherry syrup. If there's no cherry rum and redbull to make a 'cherry blast' I don't want to know about this. I haven't opened the other presents yet, maybe because I'm a tiny bit scared. Despite providing my mother a list, I strongly suspect she ust randomly chose stuff (a suspicion reinforced by cherry syrup).

Wednesday, December 15, 2004

To sleep perchance to dream

I had a lot of really vivid dreams last night. I can only remember snippets of them though. There was one I remember waking up and thinking, 'I need to find the pen and write this down because I want to remember in the morning' but I think I fell asleep before I found the pen. This got me to thinking about the weird crap that is currently in my bed with me. I am a single person sleeping dead center on a queen sized bed. I seem to stockpile crap in the space around my head. On one side, the aforementioned notebook and somewhere a pen (although that may have rolled to the floor by now) 2 books and a broken lamp. The other side... my glasses go, a little stack of rubber bands, a bandana for putting over my eyes when it is sunny outside so that I can sleep, at least 2 magazines and... at the edge of the bed, puppy biscuit crumbs and Baxter's bell ball. Apparently that's her spot. Anyway, back to the dreams. Among other things I remember dreaming about was being late to work. Not at the job I work now but I worked for a kiosk in the mall and I was supposed to be there at 9:00 and it was already 9:00 and I was just in jammies and had to go home and get dressed then go. For some reason I was on the street in front of a Starbucks with 2 of my friends (who were not actually people I know in RL) and they worked there and I was trying to convince one of them to just go open the kiosk for me and I'd be there as soon as I could. The other was about me and a non-existant boyfriend. We were doing all the cutsey boyfriend/girlfriend things people do around the holidays. I think that one came up because I was going over old posts yesterday looking for when exactly the beloved Bronco died and came across my posts about the yeti and all the cutsey boyfriend/girlfriend things we were doing during the holidays.

Tuesday, December 14, 2004

New Year's Eve

What to do.. What to do?

New Year's Eve is one of those weird holidays people have to cope with. They suck when you're single because there's that whole "kissing someone on New Year's Eve" thing to contend with. They suck for me because I really don't like crowds or people overly much. Then of course there's the "What did you do for New Year's?" question. If you're hypothetically young and hip, you're at a party or a bar and having a wild old time. Is it a sign of old age then, when you don't want to do that anymore? I've been pondering what to do this year and come up with a few options, none of which please me.

A - Do what I did 2 years ago. Go out with V to the gay bars and hang out with gay boys. Several downsides - a - Gay boys... hello they don't help me. :) b - V. His behavior while drinking lately has on more than one occasion made me angry with him. I don't really want to deal with that bullshit.

B - Volunteer. There is an art museum that is having a huge bash and they need volunteers. If you work for them for 2 hours, you get into the gig for free. I like Harvey Danger, who is playing. The downside - a - I won't know anyone and that will make me uncomfortable. b - It will probably be crowded.

C - Stay at home and watch videos (I might even break my Pay Per View cherry so to speak and order them on PPV as opposed to Blockbuster). The only real downside to this one is it is a depressing way to spend New Year's Eve given the hype that it should live up to.

What I would really rather do... If I had unlimited resources, I would love to be at either Disneyland or Disney World and just enjoying the parks all night. Yeah it would be crowded and all that but still... It is the happiest place on earth! :) Otherwise, I wouldn't mind a small party where people I know and like are all together playing board games, maybe having a few drinks and eating good food. Just something low key. Unfortunately, I don't know enough people here to do this kind of thing, or more specifically enough people here who would want to do this sort of thing. Of course... there's always a booty call in Fairbanks. ;) Bwahahaha! Or not. :) Next year, when I have my boss's income, I'll go someplace and visit people like Michelle or Katie Girl, or even, my sister.

I promise I'll be funny again..

Yesterday I noticed that my blog had been updated so I figured a comment had appeared and proceeded to go back through a bunch of posts. Hmm... no comment so I go further back. No new comments... Hmm... Then it dawns on me, I'm a retard and I was the updater. I added a new link. Anyway, as I was reading through some of my previous stuff I realized I used to be funny and kind of insightful. Lately, maudlin and preachy. When did this happen? How did this happen? I can only blame being in my 30s on this. Damn 30's. To that end, I'll try to be funny again but have to throw at least one more log on the maudlin/preachy fire. So here's a bunch of thoughts of the moment...

1 Year Anniversary Since I've been without a car. I looked back and discovered it was December 2nd that the beloved Bronco died and I made the heart wrenching decision not to get him fixed. It's been okay, especially with the assistance of Flexcar. I don't miss the expense, but I do miss the freedom. It was nice to know that if I randomly wanted to drive down to Portland for a long weekend I could. I never did that, but it was nice to know the option was there. Kind of like having condoms in the nightstand. I may never use the damn things, but it is nice to know the option is there. :)

Christmas shopping is done! I had 8 people and 2 birthdays this year. I came in 30 dollars less than I had mentally budgeted which is good. The only downer, I'm so bad with money. In my mind I had extra money (for Christmas presents) so I kept buying things for me because 'I had extra money.' Sigh. So ultimately I spent more than I had planned. Eh whatever. When I get my boss's job, I won't have to worry this much about money. Yay me!

Workcrush I haven't seen workcrush in days. I may have to dust off my stalking shoes and night vision goggles and go seek him out. :)

Friday, December 10, 2004

Worms & Random high school story

It has been raining for like a fortnight, I swear. (Or about 5 days but close enough.) As a result, there are worms all over the sidewalk. I don't like to step on them. I know they are just worms and don't have the complex thought process to register Aggghh! Someone has stepped on me, but still I feel a tiny bit bad for the worm. Plus, worm guts ew. So, as a result I walk everywhere right now with my head down, staring intently at the sidewalk to avoid them.

Which reminds me of a story from high school biology class. I took bio as a freshman because our high school had this path toward college: biology, chemistry, physics and if you were serious AP chem or AP physics. I wasn't that serious. :) So here I am, lowly little freshperson in bio class a little tweaked out about having to dissect anything. The worm was slightly tolerable, although the fumes made me cough. So next in line is the frog. I'm paired up with T&A ditzy blonde cheerleader type. Oh no, I think. Anything but this. Little did I know that T&A was totally into dissection (probably used to ripping hearts out). It totally grossed me out and I didn't want anything to do with it, but she dove in with scalpel and forceps. We actually made a good team, she would pull body parts out and I would identify them. I remember she had a big thing about fat in the frog. She cut it all out. I wonder whatever happened to her... probably is now a plastic surgeon in Beverly Hills.

Today's horrorscope

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): You'll be daydreaming about the things you long to do. A love interest will capture your attention. Together you can come up with a great plan. 5 stars

Hmm... Maybe this will help me with Christmas wish #2. (eh I have to have hope or optimism or something)

Thursday, December 09, 2004

Farking Pill

Somehow I have only 2 weeks worth of pills left after a 1 year prescription. Crap. Since my doctor has left my clinic, it isn't like I can just call the pill place and have them call her to refill it. Double crap. And I'm switching to Group Health starting Jan 1. Triple crap. Apparently I'm going to have to make a girlie appointment the 1st week of Jan. Well happy farking New Year to me. I just did the math and discovered why I've completely run out of pills early... 1 pack of 4 weeks worth, 12 packs per prescription year = 48 weeks, not the necessary 52. Luckily it isn't the pills that keep my Dermatitis Herpetiformis under control. That I couldn't wait 2 additional weeks for.

Wednesday, December 08, 2004

Christmas Wishes

I just had 25% of my Christmas wishes come true today... I guess it would be 25%. I have 2 Christmas wishes...

1 - Boss would quit and I would get her job.
2 - Meet a nice youngish man for holiday adventures with potential to become a 'thing.'

The drumroll on what portion came true today...

My boss quit. She will be terming sometime in Jan/Feb. I am very excited about this, but also full of trepidation, since I WANT HER JOB! My biggest boss was talking about pulling out the job description and interviewing candidates and the types of interviews blah blah blah and my heart was sinking a little bit. Then he said that all of that doesn't mean I shouldn't apply if I want it. If I want it?! Are you kidding me? Since day 3 I wanted it. More money, less mindnumbingness and on and on and on. But I'm secretly terrified that if I do apply I won't get it. Then what? I'm such a girl.

Tuesday, December 07, 2004

I rock!

I hit the gym this morning for the 1st time in a month. It was good to get back in the swing of things again. I managed to keep my strides/min up which made me happy. I love the showers at the gym, not the showering with other people because I have naked issues, but the water pressure and the shower heads are sooo nice! I missed those. :) I'm getting back on my 4 mornings a week program if it kills me.

Ice Skating

Whee! It was so nice to go ice skating. I love the coldness of the ice and it reminds me of Alaska. It is very zen to just go round and round. I was wobbly at first but eventually got my ice legs and felt more comfortable. The bad part was the ice was very chopped up. I don't think they ran the zamboni (although the rink was WAY too small to run a real zamboni). That was another issue, the rink was very small. And there were children with those ice skating walkers, to try to help them learn to ice skate. I don't really think they help because the kids lean too heavily on them and they don't learn to balance themselves. Plus there were several kids using them who totally didn't need them and were just playing around with them and there were some very little kids who did need them. I only stayed a little over an hour. My right leg does not like ice skating too much and it gets very cramped and tired. I was thinking about this as I was on the bus home. My right leg frequently gets leg cramps when I'm walking, and I wonder if it is a carry over from when I injured my back when I was a sophmore in college. (Holy shrit that was 10 years ago?!) My left leg was always in pain because the disc was pressing on the sciatic nerve that ran down the left leg. Since I spent over a year limping, I wonder if I still have some residual walking issues, like I developed bad walking habits. Before I lived here, I didn't do this much walking ever. I dunno.

Monday, December 06, 2004

Ice Skating Party

Yay! I am going ice skating tonight as part of the party for the International Children's Festival. I did a little research and they have ice skating as a part of Winterfest at the Seattle Center. Yay! I love ice skating and yet hardly ever go for multiple reasons. In college Shelley and I took beginner Ice Skating. I got a "P" in that class. :)

Sunday, December 05, 2004


Apparently, unlike Katie girl, I'm an enabler not an empowerer. V & I were out tonight and he was beyond drunk. I ended up dragging his sorry ass out of the bar, he claimed to want to leave, although the only way to get him was to grab his hand and take him out. He almost got into a fight, not shocking considering how gone he actually was. I was going to leave earlier, because he annoyed the crap out of me. Yet I stayed, like the fool I am. We went into another bar but did not drink. We went to IHOP (his idea) and had to bail fairly quickly because he was too drunk to sit in the restaurant, so I packed up his sandwich paid the bill & we left. I had to reassure him about 7 times that he did have his bank card and he still had to take his wallet out and look at the damn card twice.

Some random 40+ year old woman came up and talked to him and he introduced me as his wife. I didn't bother correcting that weirdness. Apparently she and her husband were in the bar trying to pick up a 3rd. She hit on me and then called me uptight when her husband pulled her away telling her to stop. I should feel annoyed by that (being called uptight), but seriously... big blonde hair married to mullet ponytail guy. I felt a tiny bit bad for the guy because he seemed a bit more than uncomfortable. She at one point asked me how I put up with it all, "Heavy drinking," was my response because really... what other response is there when you're not sure what's going on.

Shopping for the kiddies...

Today was one of those mass field trip days that I do. Although if I hadn't slept late, I wouldn't have been late for every bit of my day. :) I went up to Target and bought presents for Toys for Tots. I had picked a couple names off the tree at my work. It was fun, but I get too neurotic wanting to think it would be something the kids would really enjoy. The tag has the present idea, but you know... like when it just says books. What kind of books? But I am pleased with what I got and it was fun. I also got new panties which were necessary.

After leaving Target, I went out to the gluten free restaurant in Edmonds, Kaili's Kitchen. I got the stuffed french toast. It was good, but there was too much cream cheese and for some reason I was hoping my French Toast would come with something besides just French Toast... like bacon. :) And the service is a bit slow because there doesn't seem to be enough people, or maybe enough people who know what the fuck they're doing. Or maybe I should really be grumpy at the people taking a lifetime to make up their minds ahead of me at the counter.

Saturday, December 04, 2004

Duran Duran

When I was a little girl, my best friend and I LOVED Duran Duran. We had all their pictures out of Teen Beat and Tiger Beat and all those magazines. We had all their music on either vinyl or tape. We loved them. Junna had a crush on Simon Le Bon and I had one on Roger Taylor. I must say, Roger Taylor has not aged well. They just showed a video for their new song on VH1, and hmmm... not so hot as when I was little. I had a whole method to why I liked Roger Taylor best... Junna had Simon Le Bon so clearly he was off limits according to the best friend's code. John Taylor everybody liked. Andy Taylor was creepy and Nick Rhodes was too girlie. He wore make-up! So that left Roger Taylor. Voltaire! The logic of 5th grade girls.

Batting for the other team.

It has come to my attention that if I were a lesbian I would not be single. How have I determined this, you might wonder. Well, apparently lately every time I've gone out on a busy bar night (as opposed to the random Monday V & I go out on some nights), I get hit on by a woman. Tonight's was a 'lipstick lesbian,' according to V. I'm not 100% certain what that means, although I will infer based on the girl it means very femme. She was really pretty, probably too hot for me. :) She was waiting for her friends who all turned out to be very butch. It was an interesting dichotomy.

Wednesday, December 01, 2004

And now a very special message...

From 7th Heaven. Yes, I have learned something from the most craptastically fabulous show 7th Heaven. That lesson... Preacher's kids are the devil. Brownies started off so well tonight. I had the 5 quiet ones (please note I only have 8 brownies in the troop when all of them show up). And then the 6th quiet one showed up and I thought to myself this will be the best meeting ever! Then came 7 & 8. Neither of whom tend to listen to me although 7 is slightly better than 8 and 7's dad attended the meeting so she was totally on good behavior. Which brings me to 8. 8 makes me crazy. I ask 8 to not sing... 8 sings. I ask 8 not to sing... 8 sings and on and on. And, you guessed it, 8 is a preacher's kid. Despite all this, though, we had a good meeting. We made coptors from our badge book and as long as they were quiet and walked up the stairs appropriately and listened while we were up on the balcony of my work, we got to throw them off the 2nd floor and they thought that was the coolest thing ever. The silly little coptors actually took up almost the entire meeting time. So we didn't get to have Brownie smackdown that still needs to happen... mostly because 7 & 8 are the ones that need it most and they were like 15 minutes late so we had already started on the coptors. There's always next week I suppose.

Lunch with big gay friend

I just got back from lunch with big gay friend and found out why he was being so weird about workcrush... (See this post to jog your memory) He was going to fix me up with workcrush. And now it is hard too tell if he is or not after all. :( He thinks workcrush is the type who is too independent. But he is also the type for whom one thinks why is he single? keeping my fingers crossed, but gay boys are so unreliable sometimes. :)