I had way too much alcohol tonight and I can't stop crying. it doesn't help that i'm too good for him. it doesn't help that it will get better. nothing helps right now. all i can feel is this big pain of rejection. if i am too good for him, then what does that say about me? that i can't even hold on to a big ass nerd. And in 15 days i will probably barely remember his name, but right now all i can feel is this big hole where he was. and no matter how i try i can't stop crying. i know that a huge portion of this is alcohol.. i acknowledge that fact. but right now all i can feel is pain. and i hate it. and i am alone again. and there is no one to lean on but me. and i am so damn tired. oh so fucking tired.