Thursday, January 20, 2005

All apologies

So I apologize in advance for the fact that this is going to be a complete self-pitying rant about how much my life sucks so read at your own risk.

Why the fuck can't I ever win? Was I fucking Hitler or Pol Pot in a previous life? Seriously? Is there some cosmic balance I'm unaware of? I get one little happy thing but then one big crappyass thing? Obviously (or not so much) this would be in refernce to the fact that I didn't get my boss's job. They hired candidate #2. I could be happy they hired her. She'll be part time too apparently. She expects to be fully retired within 5 years. I'll be "groomed" for the job. Blah blah blah. It could've been worse. I could've gotten stuck with the micromanager. The upside to that would have been that I could then move to my new career choice, alcohol counselor. (micromanager = alcoholism. alcoholism= job loss & rehab. rehab = alcohol counselor) I just had my hopes up and I'm kind of sick of having my hopes crashed down. I can't maintain (or even FIND) a relationship (the first person to mention straight bar gets punched even if I have to max out my overly burdened credit cards to fly there and do it in person). I can't move forward in my job. I can't purchase property since I don't have more money because I can't move forward in my job. Bring on the cats and the shuffling defeated corporate drone look for my eyes, because I am done hoping.

We will return to our regularly scheduled entertainment tomorrow. (or later this evening)

Oh one more thing... panhandlers should totally be able to recognize if a person is either crying or on the brink of crying because panhandling to that person could result in a punching. I'm just saying.

6 comments:

Kate the Peon said...

Oh, shit. Sorry to hear about the job. I was rooting for you.

Stephen said...

I'll meet ya in a gay bar ;) Name the dart board.

On the upside, your post made me fucking laugh pretty hard. I love a good bitchy rant every once in awhile. The kind that just pisses all over the shoes of Da Man. Uses fascist references and implies the abuse of drugs.

Stephen said...

Oh yeah... and I think it's pretty brave of your to air all of your human resources hijinx on a public website.

That's the kind of chocolatey balls that an up-and-comer such as yourself needs.

Now sneak into the men's bathroom and write the home phone number of your boss on the stall wall with some crude references and stick figures with bulbous protrusions.

Peeved Michelle said...

If I did mention that going to straight bars instead of gay bars MIGHT lead to meeting a straight man, that would certainly be a way to get you to come visit.

Ian said...

Wow, you just took my entire life and wrote it down... well, except that I don't hang out in gay bars...

Sandy said...

Just Keep Swimming, Joanne. Just Keep Swimming.

We all have days where we feel like this but eventually you do win some. Win some, lose some. You'll win next time.

Sorry you didn't get the job though--I don't know you but I was rooting for you too!